A few years back, when Dave and I were trying to figure out our future, another couple was working on similar issues. Well, not similar - but issues. They're a couple of decades younger than us but, like us, had complicated lives and serious obligations.
Jan is one of the most creative persons I know: a writer, artist, minister, teacher and so much more. Gary, a singer/song writer/actor. Like us, it took several years to make the big leap into marriage.
One of the most meaningful experiences leading into our marriage was, in 2007, a six week class we took with Jan and Gary leading. It was beyond creative. We experienced art in all its forms.
An on going experience in the class was remembering a favorite holiday. One week we expressed it verbally. The next week we wrote about it. The next we created it on paper. All the while Gary was walking among us playing his guitar and singing.
Dave's finished product was amazing. A depiction of a long ago favorite Thanksgiving dinner with his wife and children.
Last week Gary died unexpectedly. Naturally, Jan is suffering mightily. In thinking about our situations and how love and loss are inseparable, the only thing I wish I'd done differently is I wish I'd cut to the chase and proposed to Dave that first time I saw him in the airport in Chicago in 2006.
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Jan is one of the most creative persons I know: a writer, artist, minister, teacher and so much more. Gary, a singer/song writer/actor. Like us, it took several years to make the big leap into marriage.
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| Dave's Thanksgiving Dinner with his family. |
One of the most meaningful experiences leading into our marriage was, in 2007, a six week class we took with Jan and Gary leading. It was beyond creative. We experienced art in all its forms.
An on going experience in the class was remembering a favorite holiday. One week we expressed it verbally. The next week we wrote about it. The next we created it on paper. All the while Gary was walking among us playing his guitar and singing.
Dave's finished product was amazing. A depiction of a long ago favorite Thanksgiving dinner with his wife and children.
Last week Gary died unexpectedly. Naturally, Jan is suffering mightily. In thinking about our situations and how love and loss are inseparable, the only thing I wish I'd done differently is I wish I'd cut to the chase and proposed to Dave that first time I saw him in the airport in Chicago in 2006.
***
