Saturday, July 31, 2010

Calcium - Bad!

Don't you just hate it when the medical community reverses itself and says that what they told you to do to be more healthy - will actually kill you?



New testing now tells us that taking calcium supplements will greatly increase your chances of having a heart attack or stroke.



Since I'm an older, small boned, health conscious woman you could call me the Calcium Supplement Queen.



Daily, I take 750 mgs in pill form, plus that yummy VIACTIV Milk Chocolate Soft Chew. (Wonder how this new info will affect their stock.)



It's a miracle that I haven't clutched my chest and keeled over in a small-boned, calcium rich heap.



I'm hoping we'll someday we'll get this report:



Fruits & veggies - Bad. French fries - Good.

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Thursday, July 29, 2010

The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo - The Movie

I know you think I'm obsessed with this Stieg Larsson Trilogy. But I never wanted to see the movie. It was playing in Maitland at the Enzian (art theater) before we left Florida in May.

But I gave up on foreign movies with sub-titles a few years ago. Besides, this movie is two and a half hours long. As you know, that's an hour over my limit.

I thought I could wait until the Hollywood version comes out in 2011 staring Daniel Craig. Daniel Craig??

But then Dave's daughter was here over the weekend and the two of them wanted to see this Swedish version which is now showing at the discount theater. So I went with them.

OK, I loved the movie. It was beautifully filmed. The sub-titles weren't a problem. I wish it had been even longer.

We're going to see the Swedish version of the next in the trilogy, "The Girl Who Played with Fire," this weekend.

OK, maybe I am obsessed.


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Monday, July 26, 2010

Depends

I didn't see the Saturday Night Live with Betty White that aired a few weeks ago but I did see several clips. In one skit she's a police captain. When somebody asks her who she thinks committed the crime she looks at the camera and says:

It's like my underwear: "Depends."

Right now I'm reading "Heaven - Our Enduring Fascination with the Afterlife." It's written by Lisa Miller who is the religion writer for Newsweek. So she isn't writing as a theologian. She's writing as a journalist and researcher.

Did the ancient Jews believe in heaven? That's always been a controversy. Lisa, after much delving into the Torah and after many discussions with great minds in that area says, essentially, no, they did not believe in heaven.

But then she says, wait, two men, Enoch and Elijah, went to heaven! In Genesis it says, "And Enoch walked with God; then he was no more, for God took him."

And most of us know the story of Elijah from the book of Kings. Elijah is walking along with his disciple Elisha (man, I used to get those two mixed up) when a whirlwind takes him up to heaven in a chariot of fire.

So, did the ancient scriptures give us a glimpse of heaven or not?

I guess it ...

Depends!


***

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Can Old Ladies Change?

This question may not be of interest to you, but it is to me. This spring I read the Pulitzer Prize winning book, "Olive Kitteridge" by Elizabeth Strout.

Olive is some character. She's a decent but terrorizing elementary school teacher, a domineering wife and mom, a scary enemy and scarier friend.

The book is made up of 13 separate stories about the people in the little town of Crosby, Maine. Olive pops in and out of the stories. Sometimes the main character - sometimes a passerby.

I know a few women like Olive. Strong life forces who have no idea of the wreckage they leave behind. Or, as their families might say, don't care about or even sometimes seem to enjoy the wreckage they create.

The astonishing part of the book is that, in the last chapter, when Olive is 74 big, sagging years old, she finally gets a deeper understanding of herself through, of all things, a love affair.

But, prior to that she gets some clues via a visit to see her son who hasn't had anything to do with her in many years.

Here's a bit of dialogue:

The son speaking: "You say you're going to leave and then accuse me of kicking you out. In the past that would make me feel terrible but I'm not going to feel terrible now. Because this is not my doing. You just don't seem to notice that your actions bring reactions."

"I just don't want to put up with it anymore."

"You have a bad temper. At least I think it's a temper. I don't really know what it is."

"I'm not going to be ruled by my fear of you, mom"

And then Olive thinks something that is her first big insight into her long unhappy life.

Fear of her? How could anyone be afraid of her? She was the one who was afraid!

Here's what I know. We're all afraid. I would hope that a couple of the old women I know who seem to operate somewhat like Olive Kitteridge would gain enough self understanding to mend relationships with the people the love before it's too late.

It's possible. I totally believe in the changed life.

***

Sunday, July 18, 2010

We Love Our Animals

One of my daughter's close friends lost her two dogs in a tragic accident this past week. My heart weeps for her and her family.



I recently received a letter from a friend who said that having to put her dog down was the hardest thing she's ever had to do - and I believe her. I do understand the love people feel for their animals.



But I also love teasing people about the crazy things they do for their pets. My sister-in-law once drove her dogs about a hundred miles to have them fixed by a kinder, gentler vet. She also regularly sneaked restaurant scallops to the neighbor's cat when she didn't think it was being fed properly.



When I told this to Dave he said they did the same thing for their cats. Then told me about his neighbor who carried their cat around in a Baby Bjorn.



Last month I read an article by Susan Orlean about the new "in" backyard pet - chickens. If you read this blog often you know how I feel about chickens! But Susan Orlean and, apparently a growing number of others, love their chickens. Susan bought four of them over the Internet along with an Eglu. A squat plastic dome that comes in bright colors, the Eglu is compact and meant for just four hens.



Susan ended up being crazy about her chickens. When one became ill she lovingly cared for it for several weeks, including force feeding daily antibiotics, but when there was no hope she took it to the vet for a fatal shot.



When she came out of his office sobbing another patient's owner gave her a hug and said, "Was it your dog?"



No, it was her chicken.

But for all of you who think that, just because I personally have what some of you describe as a "farm mentality," I do respect your love of animals.

Really.



***

Mary and Martha

The minister at Hennepin UMC preached on the Mary/Martha theme this morning. By the way, this guy is a wonderful preacher - very smart but self effacing - and seems to live what he says. He's getting ready for a four month sabbatical during which he'll travel to several different parts of the world so I'm sure the congregation will benefit from his time away.

But back to Mary and Martha. You know the story and you know the point. Martha's busy in the kitchen and a little more than ticked off that Mary's sitting around in the living room drinking up what Jesus is saying.

Here was this morning's seminal question: What was Mary eating?

The minister suggested (with the help of a disturbing quote from St. Augustine) that she was eating Truth. True - and a better choice, as Jesus pointed out to Martha.

But as a Mary kind of person who, for many, many years, was, by necessity, a Martha kind of person, I can tell you what else Mary was eating.

She was eating the food Martha was fixing up out there in the hot kitchen.

I don't do much of that anymore and I'm deeply grateful that I have the time to pursue the mysteries of God's Truth but I sincerely appreciate the fact that others feel called to feed me from time to time.


***

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Remembering the Seventies

A while back a young woman asked me if I'd ever heard of a book called "The Total Woman." Yes, I told her, I had heard of it and it was quite popular when it came out in the 70s. I didn't say much more because I didn't know where she was coming from and didn't want to offend her.

"The Total Woman" was written in 1974 by Marabel Morgan and was an immediate best seller. It was written, in large part, in response to the feminist movement that was in full swing at the time. It wasn't my cup of tea but it obviously struck a cord for millions of women.

Generally speaking, the book advocated women staying home and living exclusively for their husbands and children. Some examples were to always prepare dinner right after breakfast, including setting the table. Always embrace your husband's interests. If he goes fishing, you go fishing, etc.

And greet your husband at the door every evening wearing a different sexual fantasy type outfit.

In the early 90s I was asked to speak to a group of several thousand women in South Florida. After arriving at the event I learned that the other speaker was the daughter-in-law of Marabel Morgan.

My poetry book was being sold at the gathering and in it was a poem poking fun at Marabel's book. About a hundred copies of my book were sitting along side thousands of copies of "The Total Woman." Yikes! I didn't know if I should to 'fess up to the other speaker or what. I decided to do nothing, but I was a little on edge all day.

When the series ended I had sold a bunch of books but, fortunately, nobody ever mentioned the poem to me.

Here it is:

THE TOTAL ROBOT

For two weeks
I agreed with everything you said,
And we both developed ulcers.

I told you the awful speech you made
Was good.
And you said,
"Why did you betray me?"

I stopped wearing pants
And started wearing frilly dresses
And ribbons in my hair.
And you took me to Caravel's for lunch.

I was ready to make love
Every night for two weeks,
And the sixth night
You slept in the car.

I forced Cathy to give away her expensive
Overalls,
And you said,
"Why does my daughter hate me?"

I met you at the door
Wearing nothing but my sexy apron,
And you brought home
Three Haitian refugees and a
Catholic Priest.

I baked you a big apple pie
Every night for a week,
And you said,
"Why aren't you working on your article?"
(Just before you had the gall bladder attack.)

I told the Crisis Center
I couldn't counsel their 12 year old
Victim
Because I had to get my hair done.
And you were ashamed of me.

I said, "Yes, let's"
To everything you suggested.
And our friends had to bail us out of jail.

I dressed all of the children in pink
And lined them up to await your return.
But you never did.


***

Monday, July 12, 2010

Stuffed Animals

I once knew a woman who had her pet kitty cat stuffed, after he died, of course. I thought it was quite creepy.

Over the weekend a friend showed us a set of birds that family members had stuffed and put behind glass over 100 years ago. They were quite beautiful. I wonder how they died (couldn't have been shot, they were perfect) and how they were stuffed all that many years ago.

Then this morning I had an e-mail photo from my son who is bird hunting in Bolivia. I don't image he'll have the birds stuffed but he does have a whole herd of heads of big, beautiful animals mounted on his walls.

And now I have before me a newspaper article about my childhood hero, Roy Rogers (King of the Cowboys) who died several years ago. Christie's is auctioning off his memorabilia, including his horse, Trigger, whom Roy had stuffed in a very picturesque pose after Trigger died.

(But if you're interested in more horsepower you can bid on Roy's 1964 Bonneville convertible with door handles and gear shift made from silver plated pistols.)

I loved Roy Rogers and his lovely wife Dale Evans (Queen of the West,) and I saw him perform in person - with Trigger - several times on the grounds of Sunnyside Sanitarium where my beautiful 34 year old mother was dying from T.B.

He always let us little kids pet Trigger.

But I just didn't know what to think when Trigger was stuffed. It was creepier than the lady's kitty cat.


***

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Writings in Caves


I am a person of faith. But, as you know, I'm full of unanswered (and probably unanswerable) theological questions.

But one of the exciting clues to the scriptures, discovered in my life time, are the Dead Sea Scrolls.

They're currently on loan to the Science Museum of Minnesota. You may wonder what they're doing here since they're so valuable. It's a matter of economics. The science museum paid $6,000,000 for the loan.

We haven't seen them but we recently went to hear the guy who's the academic adviser to the museum speak about them.

He's Alex Jassen, a young Professor of Early Judaism in the Dept. of Classical and Near Eastern Studies at the University of Minnesota. Here are a couple of interesting things I learned from him along with some other research:

- The scrolls were found in caves 13 miles East of Jerusalem between 1947 and 1956.

- Made mostly from animal skins, the scrolls were not made accessible until 1991, 44 years after the discovery of the first scroll.

- They were written around 200 years Before Christ, therefore Jesus is not mentioned. They were hidden away by a Jewish sect that was most likely destroyed by Roman soldiers.

- There are over 800 scrolls and fragments, biblical and non-biblical including 19 copies of Isaiah, 25 of Deuteronomy and 30 of Psalms.

- They contain stories about Noah and Abraham including an explanation of why God asked Abraham to sacrifice his son, Issac.

While Dave and I haven't seen the scrolls here in St. Paul, I did see them in Jerusalem in the 70s. It was exciting at the time but the full value wasn't known then. Now we know they were the most important archaeological find of the 20th century.

And, to me, they are an enormous clue along the road in my mysterious faith journey.


***








Sunday, July 4, 2010

My Favorite 4th of July





On July 4th, 1976 my husband, Ken, was invited to take part in the swearing in ceremony for brand new Americans.


This was Fort Lauderdale in the middle of summer. The auditorium had no air conditioning. I envisioned a dozen immigrants standing in front of the judge, answering his questions.

Boom, we're done! Now everybody to the beach.


But, no, it wasn't like that. The auditorium was jammed with people, mostly Cubans. Many of them had experienced tremendous peril coming to the U.S. Almost every person carried an American flag.


We sang patriotic songs and when the time came for swearing in, hundreds of people came forward.


The judge gave a speech about how fortunate all of us in the room were to be living in the United States of America.


After the swearing in there was wild waving of flags, hugging, crying, laughing and singing.


Along with the other nationalities, hundreds of men and woman arrived as Cubans and left as Cuban Americans.

I was moved beyond measure.

***

Friday, July 2, 2010

Poking Fun At Larsson

Dave said, "You're gonna love 'Shouts & Murmurs' in this week's New Yorker."

He was right.

As you know, "Shouts & Murmur" is a clever, satirical column, sometimes written by very famous people. This one is by one of my favorites, Nora Ephron. She teases Steg Larsson's third novel "The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest" for it's long and difficult Swedish words.

Blomkvist appears at Salander's door. He's in despair. The umlaut won't work on his computer. Now we readers know how serious this is. How can he type city names like Svavelsjo or Strangnas or Sodertalje?

(Obviously I can't type them because I don't have an umlaut to put those two little dots over some of the vowels.)

After much soul searching, angst, profanity and use of long words, Salander finally restores Blomkvist's umlaut.

With a Q-tip.


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