On Being Fat

I'm not fat. I've never been fat. (Oh, yes, except for the four pregnancies when I gained 50 pounds each.)

My # 2 daughter gains a tremendous amount of weight when she's pregnant. Unlike me she's tall and long waisted so she gets really BIG. And she's so stunningly beautiful and "out there" that I can hardly stand it. Her husband feels the same way. We both look at her with goo goo eyes.

Most of my friends are in varying stages of "heavy" because we're older. My real husband was heavy. His entire life was spent losing weight or gaining weight. It was a constant struggle.

I think a lot of big people look great. I love to see women wear flowing colorful clothes and bright red nail polish. I think Queen Latifah is gorgeous.

I love heavy people even though sometimes they say mean things to me. I once had a sales clerk in an upscale department store say to me after she had graciously special ordered a size two raincoat, "I'm happy I was able to get this for you but I hate you because you can wear it."

Here's another statement I don't like. "You're lucky. You don't gain weight."