Power Moves

People like to assert their power in some strange ways.

Examples:

The guy who screams at his 16 year old kid for having a fender bender then takes care of it.

Or the guy who does the same thing when his wife has an accident.

The other day I inadvertenly pulled into McDonald's drive thru from the wrong side. Thinking there were no cars in line, I pulled right up to the window. The woman at the window started yelling at me, letting me know what I'd done. But then she said, "I'll let you order THIS TIME but don't ever do it again."

Realizing she was on a little power trip I said, "Oh, I'm so sorry. I wouldn't dream of letting you take my order. I'll drive around."

That took the wind out of her sails.



***

Movies

I like movies. Fortunately so does my Boyfriend. We don't see as many as I used to because we have other things to do and there aren't many that peek my interest these days.

What type movies do you like?

I like dialogue driven dramas. Intense relationships. High integrity.

Some of my favorite movies lately have been Michael Clayton, Juno, The Savages and The Debaters. I liked No Country for Old Men and American Gangster but had big problems with the endings.

Yesterday I was reading the Smithsonian Magazine while waiting in the doctor's office. There was an interview with Bruce Willis because his T-shirt from the Die Hard movies is now in the Smithsonian. When asked about his take on action movies he said,

You can draw a straight line from westerns to military to action movies. They are morality stories - good over evil.

I can appreciate that but I find action movies to be a bit boring. Unless it's like the Bourne trilogy that's so over the top that it's funny.

Also, even though I enjoy psychological thrillers, I don't want to see brutality. "Pulp Fiction" was an amazing movie in many ways but the brutality turned me off. "The Kite Runner" was one of my favorite books of the last few years but I haven't seen the movie because I've heard that it's brutal in parts.

One of the most popular movie genres is "Revenge." I think revenge movies probably help some people live out some fantasies.

My favorite genre is "Redemption." The Savages, Michael Clayton, Juno and The Great Debaters are all redemption movies.



***

Radical Fundamentalism

I heard a guy speak a few days ago. He was good. I liked that he had a point of view and the background to back it up. He's from Iran. And he wants us to pronounce that E-RON.

Some of his story parallels the main character's in "The Kite Runner" but I was sitting up close and personal to this guy when he was telling his story so it was exciting.

I like that he is a Christian convert but something he said bothered me. And it was this.

"Muslims want to take over the world."

I have a problem with "absolute" statements. I have some Muslim friends whom I love. To my knowledge, not one of them has ever made a move to take over the world.

I think a better statement might be: "Some Muslims want to take over the world." Or some Muslims with a political agenda want to take over the world.

There are those who think that: "Some Evangelical Christians want to take over the world." In fact, there are those who think that some Evangelical Christians (with a political agenda) have taken over much of the world.

I also have plenty of Evangelical Christian friends and family members whom I love. In the theological sense -not the political - I am one. (I have no take over plans.)

A Lunatic Fringe surrounds almost every movement - people who are always pushing the envelope.

During the Reagan Administration there was a group of conservative Christians who wanted to hurry up the end times.

Jesus had to contend with the Zealots.

While Christianity is the largest religion in the world, there are currently over a BILLION Muslims and the religion is rapidly growing.

Maybe we should learn a little more about each other and our true beliefs.

***

The 5th Commandment

I took my Boyfriend to our little neighborhood "Art" theater on Friday.

We saw the movie "The Savages" with Philip Seymour Hoffman and Laura Linney. She's up for an Academy Award and he, of course, should be. (He should get an Academy Award for almost every movie he's ever made.)

I loved every minute of it. It's a tragicomedy. That's what my life has been so far. I don't expect it to change.

The movie's about two middle aged children of a (bad) father who find him dumped in their laps after not seeing him for many years. Reviewers have called them (the children) heartless and mean at times. I think they are flawed human beings, doing the very best they can in a tragic situation.

Other movies like "Nothing in Common" staring Tom Hanks and Jackie Gleason have touched on this subject - but nothing like this one.

"The Savages" is real. It's raw. It struggles with the the question "Why should we help people who have hurt us?"

This movie made me feel joyful - and hopeful.



***

Prayer Flags

I'm still (slowly) working my way through Elizabeth Gilbert's bestseller, "Eat, Pray, Love." Basically, she left a bad marriage and, in the book, is now trying to "find herself" and "get in touch with God."

Worthy goals.

I guess I'm just jealous because I had to find myself and get in touch with God the hard way - while I worked, raised children, put them through college, kept my husband grounded, and did a million other things that I felt I couldn't abandon.

The book is in three parts as Gilbert travels in different parts of the world. She spent a few months in Italy (Eat.) Then in India at an Ashram (Pray), and now she's in Indonesia, Bali to be exact. So I'm thinking that this is where she'll find Love.

We had dinner at a friend's house the other night. They too, are world travelers - to exotic places. But always with a purpose - one that involves enriching the lives of other people. Each of them, separately and together, is making a difference in the world.

As I'm writing this he's making a difference in Haiti.

Recently they were in Bhutan, (Land of the Peaceful Dragon.) They stayed only a few days because, well, they have a life here that includes responsibilities (like children.)

As we were leaving the home the other evening my friend gave me a bundle of Buddhist prayer flags.

As I'm writing this they are cascading from the high point of my four poster bed. They remind me that most of the people I know are "finding themselves" and "getting in touch with God" by helping others and praying right where they are.

***

Who Are We For, Dad?

When my kids were little they loved watching sporting events with their dad. I can remember both of my sons, when they were tiny, saying at the beginning of a game,

"Who are we for, Dad?"

That's a good question to ask ourselves about our presidential candidates. I'm a voter, i.e., I've voted in every election for the past 40 years.

But there's a better question. One that should come before the WHO.

"What are we for, dad?"

There are several web sites out that allow you to see if your goals for our country line up with your candidates. My favorite is http://www.selectacandidate.com/ This site was developed by Minnesota Public Radio. It provides a 15 question quiz about Iraq, stem cells, immigration, the death penalty and so on. Thoughtfully answer the questions and at the end they'll tell you which presidential candidate most matches your beliefs.

Not only that, they'll show you how you stack up with all of the other candidates.

I wasn't surprised with the candidate they chose for me - but you might be.

By the way, they have a neat thing here in Florida whereby you can vote early at selected libraries. Our primary is coming up next week but I voted a couple of weeks ago.

Restaurants

I eat out most days. But not usually at pricey places. I have my favorites. And at each one I have a favorite item. Won't call it a meal because I very seldom eat an entire meal.

When my Boyfriend arrived on the scene my daughter gave me a talking to about not taking this refined, cultured gentleman to chain restaurants. Especially Darden restaurants. You know, like The Olive Garden.

"And please mom, don't use your coupons."

Of course I introduced him to Darden restaurants and he loves them. We eat often at Season's 52. A little pricier than the others but we share a meal.

That's right. Last Sunday we shared a lemongrass salmon salad.

Occasionally we take other people out for special meals in expensive places and it's fun - but we don't need that to have a good time.

OK, here's the problem. I recently introduced my Boyfriend to a nationwide chain restaurant that even I find a little off putting. I just knew he would finally say to me "Enough!"

I explained to him that we're doing a good thing because all of the waitresses look like they've just come from prison. I like that.

I explained to him that we don't have to over eat just because the vast majority of diners are morbidly obese. But then I tend to order something crazy because I'm overwhelmed by the menu, the twangy country music and the bric a brac covering virtually every horizontal and vertical surface.

The place kind of creeps me out but, for some strange reason, he likes it.

This morning I said "Let have breakfast wherever you want!"

Tomorrow it's my turn.