Farewell to Jeanne Robertson

 

Jeanne Robertson passed away recently.  She was one of the most popular speakers in America and will be sorerly missed.  No one will take her place, she was unique.  

 In a time when men totally dominated the public speaking field, she was a success right from the beginning. 

Early on, when she was a student at Auburn University, Jeanne entered a beauty pageant and ended up being Miss North Carolina.  What separated her from the pac early on was, in addition to being beautiful, she was 6 feet, 2 inches tall.  And she made it work for her.  Within that first year she gave 500 speeches. They were hilarious. 

As you know, I admire, and have learned a lot from, stand up comics.  Jeanne didn't call herself a comic.  She was a humorist.  In the 80s I was a member of the National Speakers Association.  At that time NSA was available only to paid professional speakers and they needed to provide documented proof of it.  It was a serious organization.  Jeanne not only qualified, but she eventually became president of this prodigious group. 

So Jeanne and I crossed paths a few times.  I was always in awe.  She knew who she was.  She was extremely hard working and traveled constantly.  She had a strict moral code about what she would and would not do.  This helped me shape my our moral code.  It wasn't the same as Jeanne's.  I had no interest in crisscrossing the country leaving my family and other priorities.  

But I was a speaker.  And I knew that, in order be heard, I had to be entertaining and disciplined and that meant continually finding better ways of communicating in an entertaining way.  I wasn't a beauty queen and I wasn't 6 feet, 2 inches tall.  But I was grounded, and hard working. 

Thank you Jeanne Robertson. 

***

Nuns and Clowns

 

My good friend sent a note to our small group telling us about her fear of nuns. When she was a little girl she had to choose between creativity and rule following and got whacked by a nun for the choice she made.  

I don't think she's really afraid of nuns but we do know there's such a thing as having irrational fears about nuns - and clowns.  

All of this reminded me of something that happened over 50 years ago.  My husband, Ken, was an urban minister in South Florida.  In response to a critical housing shortage for the poor we (I was a volunteer for this ministry) were able to get a 501(c)(3) grant to build an apartment complex for low income people in downtown Fort Lauderdale.  Ken was a master at getting people to volunteer, so much of the work, including the architect and construction folks, was done for free. 

A few months after completion, big problems developed due to drug use and other activities of the tenants and others in the neighborhood.  After trying a number of solutions including inviting tenants to be on the board, the problems remained.  It wasn't a safe place for children, especially on the weekends. 

But then Ken was able to talk a group of three nuns into moving into a ground floor apartment.  This changed everything.  Almost overnight.  These nuns were fearless.  And rebellious.  They were in the forefront of  nuns choosing not to wear habits.  Except on Friday and Saturday nights when bad things were likely to happen.  The habit wearing nuns scared the drug dealers and intimidated the cops. 

Today we have our famous Apopka nuns who advocate for impoverished migrant workers.  And they've been noted for scaring some elected officials as well. 

So, here's the thing.  I'm not afraid of nuns but I know they can be crazy intimating and I'm grateful when they use their power for good. 

I am, however, one of those people who has had a lifelong irrational fear of clowns. 

***

Boogie Woogie

 

Adam Zagajewski was a polish poet and novelist.  In 2004 he was awarded the Neustadt International Prize for literature.  He died this past March, leaving us a vast collection of his wise words.

Along with the rest of you on this planet, I've had to moderate the bad news I can handle on a given day.  A while back, as I was thumbing through my New Yorker Magazine, I saw a poem by Adam Zagajewski.  Both the poet and the magazine are noted for their heavy handed poems. 

But this was totally different.  I torn the page out and have read it multiple times.  It holds a truth for all of us.  This is the kind of place I need to go each and every day in order to stay sane and healthy.  

***

We Still Love Our Guns

Thanks to all of you who've let me know you've missed my frequent blog postings. After posting close to 2,000 thousand pages since I started this blog in 2007, I'm winding down a bit. 

 But I though you might enjoy this one I wrote in 2009. It's still relevant and it's a reminder of our fear of, and love affair with, guns.  And it's daunting to think about all the gun related tragedies that have happened since 2009. 

 *** 

 Today's newspaper ran a full page ad for guns. There were pictures of several Smith and Wesson handguns, including a Military Police 9mm. Also a few Glocks. Now I know almost nothing about guns but I have seen enough "Law and Order" episodes to know that you don't need a Glock to hunt rabbits. The ad was scary. A while back I saw a related story. A minister in Kentucky was advociating "Bring Your Gun to Church" day. Got me to thinking how we could expand this concept to bringing other things we love to church. 

 How about: "Bring Your Pit Bull to Church" day. I know several people who love their pit bulls. Probably many of the same people who love their guns. They could bring both. 

 Or how about "Bring Your Chain Saw to Church" day. There's a lovely lady in my church who wears make up and jewelry but she also clears brush and levels trees and has taken her chain saw on local mission trips for years. She told me she loves her chain saw.

 I sort of doubt that any of the above will happen at my church but if anybody's planning an event of this nature, please give me ample advance notice. 

 ***

The World's 100 Greatest Places

 

Botswana

My new Time magazine features its third annual list of the world's greatest places based, primarily, on their tribute to the people and businesses who, despite our world wide pandemic, found ways to flourish.  They range from Estonia to Antarctica. 

I've never heard of some of these places.  I'd like to see a few but it looks like my global adventures are over.  However I have friends on Facebook who continue to share their own adventures and I love going with them on my armchair ride.  

Portugal

A few years ago, when I was in Portugal, I would have loved to see, and even walk across, the world's longest suspension bridge in Arouca,  but it wasn't on our route.  I'll bet the folks in the photo here are bonding like crazy.  

Only a handful of places in the United States made the cut and most of them are surprising.  What's not surprising is that Orlando (my city) is listed. But that's because every most person in the world would like to visit the Mouse.  

Indianapolis

What was totally surprising is that my hometown, Indianapolis, more specifically, the Bottleworks District, is featured.  When I lived there in the 1950's the Coca-Cola bottling plant was a big deal.  The Bottleworks Hotel now resides in the building, complete with Art Deco design and restored spiral staircase.  My niece Sheri and sister-in-law, Sandy, live in Indianapolis.  Sandy's not well and I was actually thinking about her when I picked up the magazine and read the article - about Indianapolis.  How strange is that?

And that's what makes places so dear to us.  Being reminded of a personal connection. 

Estonia

And speaking of personal connections, a few years ago my husband David and I spent a fantastic day in Tallinn, Estonia.  It's a perfect example of preserving the old while creating the new.  Estonia is home to one of the world's leading digital economies but has retained its medieval city center. 

Almost every country in the world has a multitude of riches.  And chief among the riches are its people. 

*** 
 

 

 

Breaking the Rules

 

My church, First United Methodist of Winter Park, is in the midst of a new summer sermon series called "Happily Ever After."  It's based on the Bible and Disney movies.  I'm not a fan of Disney films so I'm at somewhat of a disadvantage.  It appears to me that I am the only person in the congregation has not seen these movies.

Mulan was last Sunday's film.  She defies her aging father and replaces him, disguising herself as a man, to serve her country in his place by becoming a fierce warrior.  Mulan is based on an ancient Chinese legend but the "woman warrior" theme has been around in many cultures, for a very long time. Think Joan of Arc. 

We women have come a long way.  But we have a ways to go.  If you've read my book, New Day, you know that I've fought some battles, though nothing like Mulan.  

When I was a minister's wife for several decades I never once considered myself "Queen of the Parsonage."  I always had dreams and aspirations that could not be squashed down to the size of a casserole dish.  I never understood the rigid gender rules.  One of the poems in the book speaks to this issue. 

THE LADY AND THE GAME

You have let me know that I have displeased you,  I have not played the game according to the rules, 

Honestly, I have tried.

It is not simply that we are from different generations,  Or that we are from different worlds.

We are not even in the same realm of consciousness. 

I do not understand the game,  But if i did,  I am certain, still, that I could not play. 

I wrote the poem decades ago but I can still relate to it.  As Pastor Rachel was closing her sermon on Philippians  she reminded us of the the defining moment for Mulan where she removes her hair comb (symbolizing her traditional path into female submissive adulthood,) and, in its place, picks up her father's scroll. 

Paster Rachel left us with this challenge:  What will you put down?    What will you pick up in its place?

I've been thinking about this all week. 

***

(New Day is available at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Target and Warmart.)

I Still Love Florida Stories

Over the years I've written several postings with variations on the title "Why I Love Florida."  They dealt with the crazy things we Floridians do. 

I gave it up for two reasons. First, the "Florida Man" meme was introduced so it keeps us abreast of  the weird and wonderful stories that make us Floridians unique.  And there is now a TV series titled "Florida Man Murders."  

The theme for the TV show is murder but the more frequent stories are about us regular folks doing really wacky and stupid things.  And it's more interesting if they're naked.  Not for any sexual reason, but just because Floridians like to take off their clothes in public.  And it's not just Florida men.  For instance, I once wrote about the county cracking down on squatters.  A policeman knocked on the door of a suspected squatter.  A naked woman opened the door.  There was a scuffle and the cop had to call for backup.  This was a perfect example of my "Why I Love Florida" series. 

But the second and more important  reason I stopped writing about them is because, in the end, they are almost all sad stories of sad people making wacky, horrible decisions (usually inspired by drugs) that have life-long repercussions.  

All this being said.....I can't resist sharing the following story that appeared in the Orlando Sentinel a week or so ago about a happening in my little community, Altamonte Springs.  

Police were called to a small market where they found the sales clerk shirtless and covered in blood. He told the cops that a man came into the store upset about a transaction that had transpired earlier in the day. The man started to pull something out of his pocket, but, fortunately, the clerk had a weapon.  Unfortunately, his weapon was a machete. And, unfortunately, the clerk injured himself with it while trying to defend himself with it.   The fight lasted several minutes and involved crashing into the portable ice cream machine. At some point the customer's brother  ran into the store and things got worse.

All three men were taken to the hospital for treatment and all were released.  The man and his brother are at the county jail on a $35,000 bond. 

As it turns out, the argument was about a bag of chips. 

***