I love "redemption" movies. One of my favorites was 2001's "Life as a House." A more recent favorite is "The Painted Veil." These are not religious movies. They're both "R" rated.
In "Life as a House", George, played by Kevin Kline, has totally lost sight of his dreams. He should have had a big Loser sign on his forehead. He's estranged from his ex-wife and son, lives in a shack and works at a job he hates. Then he gets fired and learns he has terminal cancer.
But.
Freedom's just another word for nothin' left to lose.
So he decides to tear down the shack and, with the reluctant help of his son, build a house. Yes, the house is a metaphor for his life.
I promise that if you rent this movie you will love it and it will give you some insight into your own life - and even make you feel grateful in this crazy time in which we're living. Ditto for "The Painted Veil."
Yesterday I was in a lunch/discussion group. I mentioned the "House" movie. A couple of other people had seen it and felt the same way I did.
Then a person whom I admire very much told this remarkable story:
In 2000, her daughter, who lives in Santa Monica, California, was helping to get a library started at her children's school. They had no building and no books. She learned that the house that had been built for a movie there had recently been disassembled and stored. She asked that it be donated for the library and reassembled at the school.
It was the house from "Life as a House."
Later that year the movie premiered in a little theater in Santa Monica. The proceeds were donated to the library.
So that particular house isn't just a metaphor. It will live on forever in the hearts and minds of the children who read the books they discover inside.
Remarkable!
***
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Leaving the World a Better Place
Paul Newman was among a hand full of celebrities who genuinely understand what it means to leave the world a better place.
It's what I want to do. It's what I feel called to do.
Some of us have our own Paul Newman stories. One of his "Hole in the Wall Gang" camps for kids who are seriously ill is not far from where I live. I know some of their stories.
Many years ago my husband sat on a dais with Paul during a long but important rally. Mr. Newman amused himself by peeling, slicing and eating oranges. (A good thing to do when you're trying to influence Floridians.)
But this morning I heard what is now my favorite story.
I awaken each morning at 6:30 A.M. to National Public Radio. Sometimes I hear things when I'm still half asleep so they mingle with my dreams. This is an excellent time to hear a Paul Newman story.
A neighbor of his in Connecticut was being interviewed. He explained how the Newman's neighbors treated he and Joann like everybody else so the Newman/Woodward couple was able to move about freely.
Shortly before his death, Paul, looking ravaged by his illness, took his wife to a concert. The neighbor and his wife were seated next to them. When the lights dimmed, Paul took Joann's hand and held it throughout the entire performance.
How did the neighbor react to this? He reached for his own wife's hand.
We'll all miss you, Paul. You were a class act.
***
It's what I want to do. It's what I feel called to do.
Some of us have our own Paul Newman stories. One of his "Hole in the Wall Gang" camps for kids who are seriously ill is not far from where I live. I know some of their stories.
Many years ago my husband sat on a dais with Paul during a long but important rally. Mr. Newman amused himself by peeling, slicing and eating oranges. (A good thing to do when you're trying to influence Floridians.)
But this morning I heard what is now my favorite story.
I awaken each morning at 6:30 A.M. to National Public Radio. Sometimes I hear things when I'm still half asleep so they mingle with my dreams. This is an excellent time to hear a Paul Newman story.
A neighbor of his in Connecticut was being interviewed. He explained how the Newman's neighbors treated he and Joann like everybody else so the Newman/Woodward couple was able to move about freely.
Shortly before his death, Paul, looking ravaged by his illness, took his wife to a concert. The neighbor and his wife were seated next to them. When the lights dimmed, Paul took Joann's hand and held it throughout the entire performance.
How did the neighbor react to this? He reached for his own wife's hand.
We'll all miss you, Paul. You were a class act.
***
Monday, September 29, 2008
Should Be Titled "Morally Bankrupt"
On Saturday my friend and I went to the movies. Through a series of comprises and timing errors we saw "The Women."
Sometimes I grade a movie this way: Boring vs. Not Boring.
"The Women" isn't boring. To me, it was infuriating.
It's an all women cast - no men. It's about four rich, spoiled, self absorbed women played by four fine actors. ("What were they thinking?")
In the beginning I was hoping it would be a "Redemption" movie, my favorite genre. One of the very few positive reviews suggested that it was.
Meg Ryan learns that her rich husband is having an affair with the perfume salesgirl at Saks. She reacts like a spoiled 12 year old, including emotionally abandoning her real 12 year old daughter. Just prior to learning about the affair she learns that her mean father has fired her from her part time designing job because she refuses to design clothes for older women.
Hello? That's what employees do, i.e., what their bosses require! Meg ends up getting herself together at a spa, borrowing money from her mother to start her own clothing line and, in the end letting down her mother and best friend - who got the buyer from Saks to show up and offer to buy her clothing line - by going back home to, what seemed to me to be, the same life she had at the beginning of the movie. But she did get her hair done.
Annette Benning plays a woman who lives for a job that she hates but finally quits but not before betraying her best friend and her value system. ("Annette, what were you thinking when you accepted this role?")
Debra Messing lives in an apartment in New York City with an unseen husband and four small daughters, including a nursing baby. And she's pregnant. Why? Because she and her husband love daughters? No. Because they're trying one more time for a boy. Toward the movie's climax Debra, her feet in stirrups, between her last two contractions before giving birth, tells Meg to give her cheating husband another chance because she, too, had an affair and her husband forgave her. What a multitasker! How did she have the time between the pregnancies?
Jada Pinkett Smith is a lesbian writer who lives an expensive life style after having published only one book. (I'd love to know how that works.) And she dates a really mean model who flunked her anger management class.
She also tries to get her friends, including pregnant Debra, to switch to girls thereby giving our gay bashing friends proof that the gays are trying to recruit us.
OK, what's really bothering me? We're in this terrible economy. People are suffering. Most of the people I hang out with are concerned about others who are worse off and trying to do something to make a difference.
The women in "The Women" are concerned about themselves.
***
Sometimes I grade a movie this way: Boring vs. Not Boring.
"The Women" isn't boring. To me, it was infuriating.
It's an all women cast - no men. It's about four rich, spoiled, self absorbed women played by four fine actors. ("What were they thinking?")
In the beginning I was hoping it would be a "Redemption" movie, my favorite genre. One of the very few positive reviews suggested that it was.
Meg Ryan learns that her rich husband is having an affair with the perfume salesgirl at Saks. She reacts like a spoiled 12 year old, including emotionally abandoning her real 12 year old daughter. Just prior to learning about the affair she learns that her mean father has fired her from her part time designing job because she refuses to design clothes for older women.
Hello? That's what employees do, i.e., what their bosses require! Meg ends up getting herself together at a spa, borrowing money from her mother to start her own clothing line and, in the end letting down her mother and best friend - who got the buyer from Saks to show up and offer to buy her clothing line - by going back home to, what seemed to me to be, the same life she had at the beginning of the movie. But she did get her hair done.
Annette Benning plays a woman who lives for a job that she hates but finally quits but not before betraying her best friend and her value system. ("Annette, what were you thinking when you accepted this role?")
Debra Messing lives in an apartment in New York City with an unseen husband and four small daughters, including a nursing baby. And she's pregnant. Why? Because she and her husband love daughters? No. Because they're trying one more time for a boy. Toward the movie's climax Debra, her feet in stirrups, between her last two contractions before giving birth, tells Meg to give her cheating husband another chance because she, too, had an affair and her husband forgave her. What a multitasker! How did she have the time between the pregnancies?
Jada Pinkett Smith is a lesbian writer who lives an expensive life style after having published only one book. (I'd love to know how that works.) And she dates a really mean model who flunked her anger management class.
She also tries to get her friends, including pregnant Debra, to switch to girls thereby giving our gay bashing friends proof that the gays are trying to recruit us.
OK, what's really bothering me? We're in this terrible economy. People are suffering. Most of the people I hang out with are concerned about others who are worse off and trying to do something to make a difference.
The women in "The Women" are concerned about themselves.
***
Friday, September 26, 2008
Doing Dishes
I am continually downsizing. The trunk of my car is jammed full of stuff to give away.
I'm thinking about giving away my china and some of my stemware. Beautiful dishes have to be washed by hand. I don't get that.
I have a setting for 12 of "old lady" dishes. It's English bone china with blue and lavender flowers etched on the rims. I'd love to trade it for a smaller set of plain white dishes that I can throw in the dishwasher.
I just had lunch at a rotisserie restaurant with a new friend. Great company and a good meal. My portion of the bill was $5.29. Why would I cook and wash dishes?
***
Farmer Cess
I had just enough of farm living when I was a child to know that I wanted nothing whatsoever to do with it ever again.
I appreciate farmers. I'm not one.
But some friends have banded together for a little community farming project and I agreed to be a tiny part of it. I've been to the garden twice. I'm thrilled with the okra. It's ripe and ready for picking. I've never seen okra on the vine before.
On Wednesday when I saw my friend and fellow farmer she shared five stalks of okra with me that she'd stopped to pick on the way to our meeting.
What do you do with five stalks of okra?
Last night I cut them up, fried up the little bite size pieces in some Smart Balance Omega oil, added salt and drained them on a paper towel.
Then I sat on the couch, watched CNN with the crazy Washington stuff going on and snacked on my fried okra and iced tea.
It was yummy - and a very satisfying feeling having seen the okra go all the way from the vine to my mouth.
***
I appreciate farmers. I'm not one.
But some friends have banded together for a little community farming project and I agreed to be a tiny part of it. I've been to the garden twice. I'm thrilled with the okra. It's ripe and ready for picking. I've never seen okra on the vine before.
On Wednesday when I saw my friend and fellow farmer she shared five stalks of okra with me that she'd stopped to pick on the way to our meeting.
What do you do with five stalks of okra?
Last night I cut them up, fried up the little bite size pieces in some Smart Balance Omega oil, added salt and drained them on a paper towel.
Then I sat on the couch, watched CNN with the crazy Washington stuff going on and snacked on my fried okra and iced tea.
It was yummy - and a very satisfying feeling having seen the okra go all the way from the vine to my mouth.
***
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Attitude is Everything
Yesterday I met with my Power Rangers. Even though, as a group and as individuals, we're positive, giving, smart and powerful, we started fussing a bit about our own personal portfolios. After all, we're older women.
But then one of us read something that immediately brought us back into proper focus. We ended up having a loving, uplifting, outgoing conservation.
I've had a good bit of response from my posting of a couple of days ago, "H-E-Double Toothpicks." My take on it is that people are scared and feeling negative about our country and our world.
As a person said to me yesterday, "I know what hell is like, I'm there." But when we got to talking, things are not so bad for him. He's projecting some bad stuff in the future.
Following is a little story about hell. It's partly from C. S. Lewis and partly from M. Scott Peck. I'm telling it from memory so my apologies to Clive and Scott.
A young man was in heaven. There were occasional bus tours to hell. He decided to go this one time because his uncle was in hell and he wanted to say hi to him.
After they arrived he and his totally miserable uncle had a little visit. When it was time to board the bus to return to heaven the young man said,
"Uncle, why don't you come back to heaven with me?"
The uncle was unsure. He said, "Let me ask you some questions."
"Back on earth I always had my personal staff to wait on me. They did what I told them to do. Will I have a staff in heaven?"
The nephew said, "Well, it doesn't work that way. You won't need a staff."
"You know I was a professor and I had tenure. Will I have tenure in heaven?"
The nephew thought for a minute and said, "Again, it doesn't really work that way. Everybody has tenure."
This bothered the uncle.
They had some more conversation but when it was time for the bus to leave for heaven the uncle decided not to get on.
He chose to stay in hell.
***
But then one of us read something that immediately brought us back into proper focus. We ended up having a loving, uplifting, outgoing conservation.
I've had a good bit of response from my posting of a couple of days ago, "H-E-Double Toothpicks." My take on it is that people are scared and feeling negative about our country and our world.
As a person said to me yesterday, "I know what hell is like, I'm there." But when we got to talking, things are not so bad for him. He's projecting some bad stuff in the future.
Following is a little story about hell. It's partly from C. S. Lewis and partly from M. Scott Peck. I'm telling it from memory so my apologies to Clive and Scott.
A young man was in heaven. There were occasional bus tours to hell. He decided to go this one time because his uncle was in hell and he wanted to say hi to him.
After they arrived he and his totally miserable uncle had a little visit. When it was time to board the bus to return to heaven the young man said,
"Uncle, why don't you come back to heaven with me?"
The uncle was unsure. He said, "Let me ask you some questions."
"Back on earth I always had my personal staff to wait on me. They did what I told them to do. Will I have a staff in heaven?"
The nephew said, "Well, it doesn't work that way. You won't need a staff."
"You know I was a professor and I had tenure. Will I have tenure in heaven?"
The nephew thought for a minute and said, "Again, it doesn't really work that way. Everybody has tenure."
This bothered the uncle.
They had some more conversation but when it was time for the bus to leave for heaven the uncle decided not to get on.
He chose to stay in hell.
***
Monday, September 22, 2008
Who Will Get Your Stuff?
We think that our kids want our money when we're gone. While that's probably true for many of us, the experts tell us that it's the little, sentimental things that middle aged kids fight over.
It's that rotary egg beater that your grandma gave you that is likely to cause a family war.
I had a reminder today of how true this is when I read a very sweet but gutsy blog posting from a family member.
So this afternoon I've been pondering (again) about how to label my little - seemingly meaningless but very meaningful to me - heirlooms.
Some experts tell us not to give them to our sons because they won't appreciate them or will hand them over the their wives.
Some experts tell us that - if one child is closer and gives us more attention - give that child the good stuff. (That will show the others a thing or two!)
I know exactly what I want to do. I want to split my meaningful things as evenly as humanly possible between all of my children.
I hope I leave enough money for them to throw a big party together with their spouses, children and (hopefully) grandchildren and roll their eyes about the crazy stuff I left them.
***
It's that rotary egg beater that your grandma gave you that is likely to cause a family war.
I had a reminder today of how true this is when I read a very sweet but gutsy blog posting from a family member.
So this afternoon I've been pondering (again) about how to label my little - seemingly meaningless but very meaningful to me - heirlooms.
Some experts tell us not to give them to our sons because they won't appreciate them or will hand them over the their wives.
Some experts tell us that - if one child is closer and gives us more attention - give that child the good stuff. (That will show the others a thing or two!)
I know exactly what I want to do. I want to split my meaningful things as evenly as humanly possible between all of my children.
I hope I leave enough money for them to throw a big party together with their spouses, children and (hopefully) grandchildren and roll their eyes about the crazy stuff I left them.
***
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