I'm still dealing with the hypertension. Things are moving along and I should be happy but I'm still having side effects from the meds. Side effects that closely resemble the spiking B/P symptoms.
For my whole life I've had skinny ankles. When I was pregnant (all four times) I gained an enormous amount of weight but my arms and legs still resembled sticks. I looked like a balloon animal. Never any swelling other than my torso.
My hands and feet are ridiculously small. They resemble Blondie Bumstead's.
Or used to.
Now at about 3 PM the swelling begins. By six I can forget about anything resembling an attractive shoe if I plan to walk at all.
Last night I wore my clown shoes to the movies hoping no one would notice.
I should be counting my good health blessings but instead I'm lamenting the loss of my ankles.
***
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Friday, January 11, 2008
Hospice
My Boyfriend's little sister is going to hospice. He's grateful that he got to have a good visit with her while we were on our road trip.
As you may know hospice is a wonderful concept. When the time comes for us to stop struggling with trying to stay alive we can let hospice gently help us go in the other direction. This doesn't necessarily mean that we'll die soon. It does mean that all of the painful treatments, chemo, radiation, dialysis, traveling across the country for one last procedure, etc. STOPS. And we are encouraged to rest and let nature take its course - pain free.
Several years ago I was on a terrible committee. I lived in a county where hospice was overcrowded. It was essentially our job to kick people out of the program. Why? Because to be in hospice you must have a diagnosis of being terminal within six months.
Hospice was so wonderful that people were living longer than six months - especially children. Should we throw them out so that others could get in?
My Boyfriend's Real Wife went to hospice. My Real Husband was with hospice but stayed at home. My Boyfriend's sister making this decision has brought up those memories. Not all of them are bad.
Right now he's writing her a letter. Should he e-mail it or is there time to send it through the regular mail? What should it say?
As you may know hospice is a wonderful concept. When the time comes for us to stop struggling with trying to stay alive we can let hospice gently help us go in the other direction. This doesn't necessarily mean that we'll die soon. It does mean that all of the painful treatments, chemo, radiation, dialysis, traveling across the country for one last procedure, etc. STOPS. And we are encouraged to rest and let nature take its course - pain free.
Several years ago I was on a terrible committee. I lived in a county where hospice was overcrowded. It was essentially our job to kick people out of the program. Why? Because to be in hospice you must have a diagnosis of being terminal within six months.
Hospice was so wonderful that people were living longer than six months - especially children. Should we throw them out so that others could get in?
My Boyfriend's Real Wife went to hospice. My Real Husband was with hospice but stayed at home. My Boyfriend's sister making this decision has brought up those memories. Not all of them are bad.
Right now he's writing her a letter. Should he e-mail it or is there time to send it through the regular mail? What should it say?
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
What a Couple!
On our recent trip my Boyfriend and I drove from the Carolinas to Atlanta. It was my second visit in a few days. The first was to see family. This time our destination was the High Museum.
We stayed at the Granada Hotel in mid town. Very old and picturesque but the rooms were cold. Atlanta had a big cold snap the day we arrived. The fountain in the middle of the courtyard was an ice sculpture.
We walked to the museum. The High was designed by Richard Mier. He also designed the Getty in L.A. He likes white. Just looking at the building was a treat for the eyes.
The big deal in the museum was the ancient Egyptian exhibit on loan from the Louvre. Two hundred years ago this Egyptian stuff was reintroduced to the modern world (at that time) by this cool French couple named:
Napoleon and Josephine
They were the fashionistas of their time. If they said it was hot - it was hot. Actually Josephine was the trend setter and she liked all things Egyptian. Napoleon was "head over heels" for her so he went along - as many husbands do.
So France had an Egyptian art renaissance a couple of hundred years ago and we're still enjoying it.
All of this culture was happening even while Napoleon was out fighting wars and Josephine was back home cheating on him. They were multi-taskers.
We stayed at the Granada Hotel in mid town. Very old and picturesque but the rooms were cold. Atlanta had a big cold snap the day we arrived. The fountain in the middle of the courtyard was an ice sculpture.
We walked to the museum. The High was designed by Richard Mier. He also designed the Getty in L.A. He likes white. Just looking at the building was a treat for the eyes.
The big deal in the museum was the ancient Egyptian exhibit on loan from the Louvre. Two hundred years ago this Egyptian stuff was reintroduced to the modern world (at that time) by this cool French couple named:
Napoleon and Josephine
They were the fashionistas of their time. If they said it was hot - it was hot. Actually Josephine was the trend setter and she liked all things Egyptian. Napoleon was "head over heels" for her so he went along - as many husbands do.
So France had an Egyptian art renaissance a couple of hundred years ago and we're still enjoying it.
All of this culture was happening even while Napoleon was out fighting wars and Josephine was back home cheating on him. They were multi-taskers.
Monday, January 7, 2008
What's Love Got to Do With It?
I'm reading the best selling book "Eat, Love, Pray" by Elizabeth Gilbert. Just finishing the first 3rd of the book and so far I'm not crazy about it. But I suspect that it will get much better. She's being very open about who she is and how she operates.
Sometimes when people are real they scare us.
She writes a funny description about her dysfunctional relationships. It looks familair to me. I know people who function this way.
While this does NOT describe my close friends I do know women who, even at my age, are still doing this:
...I disappear into the person I love. I am the permeable membrane. If I love you, you can have everything. You can have my time, my devotion, my (body,) my money, my family, my dog, my dog's money, my dog's time - everything. If I love you, I will carry for you all your pain, I will assume for you all of your debts (in every definition of the word), I will protect you from your own insecurity, I will project upon you all sorts of good qualities that you have never actually cultivated in yourself and I will buy Christmas presents for your entire family. I will give you the sun and the rain, and if they are not available, I will give you a sun check and and rain check. I will give you all of this and more, until I get so exhausted and depleted that the only way I can recover my energy is by becoming infatuated with someone else.
What Elizabeth Gilbert describes is certainly not what a Woo Woo woman is all about.
***
Sometimes when people are real they scare us.
She writes a funny description about her dysfunctional relationships. It looks familair to me. I know people who function this way.
While this does NOT describe my close friends I do know women who, even at my age, are still doing this:
...I disappear into the person I love. I am the permeable membrane. If I love you, you can have everything. You can have my time, my devotion, my (body,) my money, my family, my dog, my dog's money, my dog's time - everything. If I love you, I will carry for you all your pain, I will assume for you all of your debts (in every definition of the word), I will protect you from your own insecurity, I will project upon you all sorts of good qualities that you have never actually cultivated in yourself and I will buy Christmas presents for your entire family. I will give you the sun and the rain, and if they are not available, I will give you a sun check and and rain check. I will give you all of this and more, until I get so exhausted and depleted that the only way I can recover my energy is by becoming infatuated with someone else.
What Elizabeth Gilbert describes is certainly not what a Woo Woo woman is all about.
***
Woo Woo in the Woods
Recently somebody asked me what "Woo Woo" meant. I was stuck. It's kind of like the descriptive word "Granola." The picture immediately comes to my mind of a woman in a long skirt and Birkenstocks eating an organic carrot.
But that's just me. You may have a different definition of "Granola."
When I describe my friends as "Woo Woo" I mean that they're spiritual, always seeking knowledge and wisdom, willing to embrace the mystery of the universe and the mystery of themselves. I don't picture any one person because to be "Woo Woo" means to be ones self.
We're all different.
One of my Woo Woo friends, a person whom I greatly admire, preached the sermon at my church yesterday. She had on a flowing liturgical robe and really cute shoes.
So on our road trip my Boyfriend and I stopped to visit one of my Power Rangers and her Significant Other in their cabin in the woods in North Carolina.
She's Woo Woo.
The first thing we did was take a bottle of wine to her tree house. It's a two platform structure deep in the woods - built by him but decorated by her. Hanging from the beautiful wooden planks are jewelry items, various wind chimes, angels - you get the idea.
After a glass of wine in the tree house she and I walked her labyrinth. It's next to the tree house.
Their cabin (house really) is a work of art. As are the woods surrounding it. He says with a sigh that she likes to manicure the forest.
You may think that she has way too much time on her hands. Quite the opposite. She has a huge job back here in the city - with much stress.
Sometimes she's a round peg in a square hole.
She's Woo Woo.
But that's just me. You may have a different definition of "Granola."
When I describe my friends as "Woo Woo" I mean that they're spiritual, always seeking knowledge and wisdom, willing to embrace the mystery of the universe and the mystery of themselves. I don't picture any one person because to be "Woo Woo" means to be ones self.
We're all different.
One of my Woo Woo friends, a person whom I greatly admire, preached the sermon at my church yesterday. She had on a flowing liturgical robe and really cute shoes.
So on our road trip my Boyfriend and I stopped to visit one of my Power Rangers and her Significant Other in their cabin in the woods in North Carolina.
She's Woo Woo.
The first thing we did was take a bottle of wine to her tree house. It's a two platform structure deep in the woods - built by him but decorated by her. Hanging from the beautiful wooden planks are jewelry items, various wind chimes, angels - you get the idea.
After a glass of wine in the tree house she and I walked her labyrinth. It's next to the tree house.
Their cabin (house really) is a work of art. As are the woods surrounding it. He says with a sigh that she likes to manicure the forest.
You may think that she has way too much time on her hands. Quite the opposite. She has a huge job back here in the city - with much stress.
Sometimes she's a round peg in a square hole.
She's Woo Woo.
Saturday, January 5, 2008
Book Recomendation
Somebody gave my Boyfriend a book. I read the first page and instantly knew I would love it, so he bought me my very own copy.
I don't want you to think that he lavishes me with gifts. We don't have that kind of relationship plus I don't need or want any more stuff. Nor does he.
But I didn't want to read his copy of the book because I have to write in it. It's that kind of book. It's called:
The Intellectual Devotional by David Kidder and Noah Oppenheim
It's not a spiritual devotional. It's a secular book in the same tradition with one year's worth of daily readings on history, literature, arts, science, music, philosophy....and religion.
One of the first entries is on James Joyce's book Ulysses. Years ago I found this book very hard to read. But it was worth it. It's based on Homer's Odyssey but it's about a Jewish guy named Leopold Bloom. He's a good guy during hard times. Joyce calls what he does "Everyday heroism."
Today we would call it "Random acts of kindness."
I'm not recommending that you read Ulysses. James Joyce didn't like to use periods and commas. But you can read this page of The Intellectual Devotional and then pretend that you read Ulysses.
But if that's too hard just rent the movie Evan Almighty. It's the same message.
***
I don't want you to think that he lavishes me with gifts. We don't have that kind of relationship plus I don't need or want any more stuff. Nor does he.
But I didn't want to read his copy of the book because I have to write in it. It's that kind of book. It's called:
The Intellectual Devotional by David Kidder and Noah Oppenheim
It's not a spiritual devotional. It's a secular book in the same tradition with one year's worth of daily readings on history, literature, arts, science, music, philosophy....and religion.
One of the first entries is on James Joyce's book Ulysses. Years ago I found this book very hard to read. But it was worth it. It's based on Homer's Odyssey but it's about a Jewish guy named Leopold Bloom. He's a good guy during hard times. Joyce calls what he does "Everyday heroism."
Today we would call it "Random acts of kindness."
I'm not recommending that you read Ulysses. James Joyce didn't like to use periods and commas. But you can read this page of The Intellectual Devotional and then pretend that you read Ulysses.
But if that's too hard just rent the movie Evan Almighty. It's the same message.
***
A Tiny Mix Up
OK, here's what I know for sure.
We were traveling South.
It's fun to see country places and small towns that "make do" with smaller venues than we city folks are used to. For instance, we stopped for a few minutes at "Ronnie's Gym and Window Tinting." How convenient if you should need both.
Then we're traveling along and I see a sign that says "Athens." So I say to my Boyfriend, Athens is a very sophisticated small town. It's where the University of Georgia is located. Why don't we stop there and tour the school?
He's says, "Sure" because he's a very agreeable guy.
So we get off the Interstate and drive a few miles to get to Athens. Only it's Athens, Tennessee. The University of Georgia is not located there.
But Tennessee Wesleyan is. And it's a Methodist school. So we toured that. On foot.
We had to confess to the guy at the coffee shop on the town square that we were in the wrong Athens, touring the wrong school in the wrong state.
But we enjoyed ourselves.
***
We were traveling South.
It's fun to see country places and small towns that "make do" with smaller venues than we city folks are used to. For instance, we stopped for a few minutes at "Ronnie's Gym and Window Tinting." How convenient if you should need both.
Then we're traveling along and I see a sign that says "Athens." So I say to my Boyfriend, Athens is a very sophisticated small town. It's where the University of Georgia is located. Why don't we stop there and tour the school?
He's says, "Sure" because he's a very agreeable guy.
So we get off the Interstate and drive a few miles to get to Athens. Only it's Athens, Tennessee. The University of Georgia is not located there.
But Tennessee Wesleyan is. And it's a Methodist school. So we toured that. On foot.
We had to confess to the guy at the coffee shop on the town square that we were in the wrong Athens, touring the wrong school in the wrong state.
But we enjoyed ourselves.
***
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