I'm reading this devotional by Richard Rohr. It's based on AA's twelve steps. I've used several devotionals over the years based on the steps. I like hard hitting devotionals. If the devotional has a picture of puppy dogs or flowers on the front I'm probably not going to like it. I like my devotionals down and dirty.
Rohr's book is based on a poem by Carol Bieleck. I love the poem. It's most likely about addiction. I'm not dealing with addiction but I believe the poem is about me.
I'm a planner who likes to live a nice orderly life. I like to anticipate the future and get ready for it. But then, bang, what was "over there" comes "right here." And I find myself in a place I never though I'd be.
This year I need to learn how to be eighty. And probably learn, once more, to breathe underwater.
I hope you'll read the poem. It might be about you too.
Breathing Under Water by Carol Bieleck.
I built my house by the sea.
Not on the sands, mind you;
not on the shifting sand.
And I built it of rock.
A strong house
by a strong sea.
And we got well acquainted, the sea and I.
Good neighbors.
Not that we spoke much.
We met in silences.
Respectful, keeping our distance,
but looking our thoughts across the fence of sand.
Always, the fence of sand our barrier,
always, the sand between.
And then one day,
-and I still don't know how it happened-
the sea came.
Without warning.
Without welcome, even
Not sudden and swift, but a shifting across the sand
like wine,
less like the flow of water than the flow of blood.
Slow, but coming.
Slow, but flowing like an open wound.
And I thought of flight and I thought of growing
and I thought of death.
And while I thought the sea crept higher, till it
reached my door.
And I knew then there was neither fight, nor death
nor drowning.
That when the sea comes calling you stop being
neighbors
Well acquainted, friendly-at-a-distance, neighbors
And you give your house for a coral castle,
And you learn to breathe underwater.
***
