But the word I would use for Jim now is "brave." He has been a constant inspiration to me as I write this blog. He's always been remarkably open and honest about himself. I want to do the same.
Several of you readers have asked me to share more of his writings. But Jim is not the funny, witty guy he was when he first started on his Alzheimer's journey. He is struggling. He's mostly writing prayers that bless me and scores of others.
I've known several people with dementia, including my husband Ken. Most folks refuse to deal realistically with what's happening. In fact, I've never known of a person who has been as open and honest about himself and this illness as Jim McWhinnie.
Following is a small sampling of a prayer Jim wrote yesterday.
Lord, I feel of late as if I my life is being disassembled a little bit each day. Oh, my soul is strong, my peace is strong, my faith is strong, as is my love. But so many other parts of me ... well, they have begun to fall away.
I loved to play games of chess
... but my mind now gets so confused and my concentration now quickly fades.
I have for years worked hard and
risen from my poverty and ignorance, but now the work exhausts me so and my
inner drive sputters almost to a stop, now and then.
I still have the will to live ...
but it is not as powerful as it once was ... now that Day to Come is more
inviting, more and more ...
I still have the moments I have
gathered through the years, but their memories are becoming falling leaves in
the latter days of autumn.
Lord, am I depressed? To a degree
I would suppose. But more precisely ... I am fading.
Jim McWhinnie
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