On Tuesday I met with my book club ladies to discuss "Loving Frank," the story of the love affair between Mamah Cheney and Frank Lloyd Wright.
As you know from a previous blog posting, I was fussing and fuming all the while I read the book about these two and their selfishness. For instance, they left two spouses and eight kids who loved them.
A couple of the book club ladies said that it's never OK to leave your kids. On the other hand, some of them were willing to give Frank Lloyd Wright a pass because he was a genius who left a great legacy to the world.
Is leaving always wrong, especially for a mom?
I struggled with that issue a bit when my kids were young. I could have been much more successful in my work if I'd traveled more - and sometimes we desperately needed the money. But I was away overnight very little. In fact, I don't think my kids were very aware of my working.
This morning's newspaper brought the news that the mother of a much loved and respected politician here in Florida died. Mel Martinez was a former mayor of Orange County and went on to become our first Cuban-American senator. His brother, Ralph, is a well known attorney.
In the early 1960, their mom, Gladys Martinez and her husband made the decision to send their two sons to the United States after Castro took over in Cuba. They weren't sure if they'd ever see them again. But they were reunited four years later when the parents were able to come to Florida.
I know two moms who've been deployed to Iraq and Afghanistan - twice.
Dave's mom lived most of her adult life in Malaysia as a missionary. Dave turned out to be a magnificent man.
My mom was in a T.B. sanitarium while I grew up. Then she died.
So I can't put a pox on all moms for leaving. I guess we have to evaluate it case by case.
Mamah Borthwick Cheney was an intellectual, a mother, a feminist, and a translator. But she could have been all of that and stayed home with her kids. It appears to me that she abandoned them, along with her husband, sister and others simply because she fell in love with Frank Lloyd Wright.
That, to me, is wrong.
***
As you know from a previous blog posting, I was fussing and fuming all the while I read the book about these two and their selfishness. For instance, they left two spouses and eight kids who loved them.
A couple of the book club ladies said that it's never OK to leave your kids. On the other hand, some of them were willing to give Frank Lloyd Wright a pass because he was a genius who left a great legacy to the world.
Is leaving always wrong, especially for a mom?
I struggled with that issue a bit when my kids were young. I could have been much more successful in my work if I'd traveled more - and sometimes we desperately needed the money. But I was away overnight very little. In fact, I don't think my kids were very aware of my working.
This morning's newspaper brought the news that the mother of a much loved and respected politician here in Florida died. Mel Martinez was a former mayor of Orange County and went on to become our first Cuban-American senator. His brother, Ralph, is a well known attorney.
In the early 1960, their mom, Gladys Martinez and her husband made the decision to send their two sons to the United States after Castro took over in Cuba. They weren't sure if they'd ever see them again. But they were reunited four years later when the parents were able to come to Florida.
I know two moms who've been deployed to Iraq and Afghanistan - twice.
Dave's mom lived most of her adult life in Malaysia as a missionary. Dave turned out to be a magnificent man.
My mom was in a T.B. sanitarium while I grew up. Then she died.
So I can't put a pox on all moms for leaving. I guess we have to evaluate it case by case.
Mamah Borthwick Cheney was an intellectual, a mother, a feminist, and a translator. But she could have been all of that and stayed home with her kids. It appears to me that she abandoned them, along with her husband, sister and others simply because she fell in love with Frank Lloyd Wright.
That, to me, is wrong.
***
