Who's Your Favorite Baldwin?

This picture was taken last week. It's Stephen Baldwin along with local talk show host, Shannon Burke. Stephen was the speaker at a downtown leadership prayer breakfast that my sons and others host each year. He did a great job.

Stephen is the born again, conservative republican Baldwin.

Daniel is the celebrity rehab, bad boy Baldwin.

Billy is the successful, married to the same wife forever Baldwin.

This morning I read a long article in the New Yorker about Alec, the oldest and most famous Baldwin.

Billy says in the article that if you want to know how Alec feels about his brothers, here's an example.

Alec once wrote a screenplay where he and his brothers were to portray a family of gunfighters.

As Billy tells it:

Basically it was: Daniel's the outlaw, I'm (Billy) the riverboat gambler who gets all the (women,) the shallow, good looking sap; Stephen's the village idiot; and he's (Alec) the #*!# hero. ...the one who saves the day in the end.

I think I'd call Alec the complicated one. We all know that he's a divorced dad. (We've all heard that famous and painful voice mail to his daughter.) On the other hand, he's a smart, funny, extremely talented actor, writer and director and very passionate about life - and his brothers.

He's also perpetually unhappy.

Lorne Michaels, the SNL producer and model for Alec's character on "30 Rock" said to him:

Alec, you have one of the best writers in television (Tina Fey) writing this part for you. It's shot in New York, where you choose to live. You work three days week, you get paid a lot of money, you're getting awards. It's a great time in your life. It's an all-good thing. And, if you were capable of enjoying it, it would be even better.

Some might say that Alec should go the way of his brother, Stephen. But Alec is a non drinking, church going, praying, vegetarian democrat.

My take on the Baldwin brothers (and their two sisters) is that they're much like many other big families - only rich and famous.


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I Blame Jack Sparrow

Have you heard about the pirates off the coast of Somalia? They're hijacking, among other ships, Saudi Supertankers.

But these are, apparently, a new breed of pirates. They don't harm their captives. In fact, they hug and kiss them and let them call their families on their international cell phones.

Instead of menacing names like "Pegleg" a pirate spokesperson calls himself "Daybed."

How are they managing to board these huge ships? The ships are not armed. They've been instructed to fight off the pirates with fire hoses.

These new and improved pirates are not interested in the booty aboard the ships. They just want money - and lots of it.

I think Disney has made this pirate business way too attractive.


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Smoke Gets in My Eyes

AMC's popular series "Mad Men" features some great looking men. I've never seen the series but I like John Slattery's looks. I'd let my hair go white if I thought it would look like his.

"Mad Men" also features smoking.

They've had to let the public know that , no, it's not tobacco the actors are smoking. They're smoking herbs. But they're pretending to smoke tobacco to but true to the pre 1970s era.

Back then everybody smoked. They smoked in restaurants and movie theaters and at work. All smoking all the time.

Once, years ago, when my son was hospitalized in North Carolina while we were on vacation, they let our family eat in the doctor's dining room. It was blue with smoke. When the doctor met with us in his office he chained smoked.

This week I watched two absolutely wonderful old movies on TCM. "To Have or Have Not" with Humphrey Bogart and Loren Bacall in her very first roll. It's worth watching the movie just to see her do her little jiggy dance at the end. But the whole movie is good. Lots of similarities to "Casablanca."

But an interesting aside is that they both chain smoked during the entire movie.

Last night on PBS I watched "Laura" with Gene Tierney, Dana Andrews and the great Clifton Webb. Also an excellent movie. But Dana and Clifton never put the cigarettes down. Gene, playing Laura, was dead for most of the movie so I don't remember her smoking so much.

I found the smoking distracting and disgusting in both movies.

I grew up in a family where everybody smoked. They smoked while they were cooking and during meals. I remember wanting to crawl up into my dad's lap but being repelled by the constant cigarette smoking.

I never tried it - and I'm so happy that I now live in a smoke-free world.


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And a Sense of Humor Helps

This morning in my Sunday school class we discussed hope and faith and how important it is for people our age to share these concepts with younger people in these hard times.

Somebody mentioned how important it is, as well, to keep your sense of humor in times of great stress and hardship. That reminded me of a visit my husband and I had just a few weeks before he died. I shared the following with the class.

Our son called one afternoon to say that his boss had just flown in from Atlanta expressly to pay his respects to my husband - knowing that he was near death. They were on the way in from the airport.

Well, see, the problem was that we'd just gone out to lunch and my husband was sitting on the couch in his favorite pink dress shirt, looking pretty darn spiffy.

So I explained to my husband that our son's boss would probably be disappointed that he came all that way to find him sitting in the living room with his doggy bag from the restaurant.

So, I got him into the wheelchair, took him to his room and got him into his hospital bed. No time to get the great looking shirt off so I just tucked the sheet up around his chin.

Our son and his boss showed up. (He's actually a very nice guy.) He paid his respects and left.

Afterwards I told my husband what a great sport he'd been. He wasn't able to speak much by that time but he let me know that it was fun for him.

The next time my son's boss flew in was for the memorial service.


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Edgy Knowledge Cards

Frequently I buy books from a mail order bookstore. Many of their things are artistic, deep and a bit edgy.

A while back I ordered, among other things, something that was described in the catalog as "Women of the Old Testament Knowledge Cards." I was planning to give them to a conservative relative whom I love a lot.

When they arrived early this week I thought the box looked edgy. I got a little nervous so I carefully opened it to peek at the cards.

uh oh!

The pack was shrink wrapped so I could see only the front of the first card "Eve" and the back of the last card "Queen of Sheba."

But it was enough to know that they won't be leaving the house.

The artist is a former member of the Benedictine order and the writer is a professor at Hartsford Seminary so the cards aren't X rated but....

...let's just saw that the Old Testament is full of sex and violence, much of it directed at women, and the cards depict this in somewhat graphic ways.

I tore open the package to check them out. Since Monday I've read a few of the cards each morning.

They've impacted me deeply and spiritually. I'm being reminded of ancient women who had absolutely no power, who sometimes lived brutal lives, but were, many times, able to rise up and be strong anyway.

When Clinton and Palin talk about the 18 million cracks in the glass ceiling we all need to remember that it started with some of these ancient women.


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Whoops!

We're all feeling bad about the lady astronaut who dropped her tool bag in outer space a few days ago.

I have two observations.

First, women have a pretty keen sense of what to drop and what to hang on to when things get a little chaotic. If a woman has groceries in one hand and the baby in the other and stubs her toe and starts to lose her balance - she'll drop the groceries every time.

Second, we're pretty flexible about tools. In a pinch I use chewing gum to hold a picture straight or plug a hole in the wall.

So if astronaut Heidemarie Stefanyshyn-Piper thought to take with her a paper clip, a hanger, some duct tape and chewing gum - I'm sure she'll be fine without her tool bag.


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Who Can I Blame?

A couple I love, relatives actually, are having marriage problems.

All day yesterday I was trying to think of who (whom) to blame.

At first I thought it was those darn gays. Although this couple lives in a conservative state, they didn't pass a "no gays can get married law" like we did here in Florida (because we all know that it's those gays that are causing our marriages to flop.)

But I don't think blaming gays will help in this situation.

Then I thought of what another friend who's husband had left after years of a bad marriage said to me when I tried to get her to go to counseling.

Why should I go to counseling? The Devil breaks up marriages!

But I don't think blaming the Devil will help this situation.

I don't know what the answer is. But I do know that this smart, funny, talented couple has blessed countless other people throughout their long marriage. We'll all be poorer if they don't make it.

But what's even more important is they're both suffering and they both have personal issues to deal with. (Don't we all?) I think she's up to it. I don't know about him.

But we do know that this life - that God gives us - is all about new beginnings.


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The Oldies Saga Continues

This morning I met my oldies for Saturday breakfast as usual. Their exciting news for this week was that - they lost both of their credit cards.

They had them cancelled but the new ones won't arrive for a week or so. So they've been eating in restaurants as usual and then promising to pay when the cards show up. So far so good.

Mr. Oldie fell a couple of days ago in a restaurant (not unusual.) He cut his arm but drove himself to his doctor's office to get bandaged up. The doctor's wife did the bandaging. No charge!

I have accused him on occasion of having these little accidents on purpose because he loves the drama. In fact, I've called him the "Fall Down King" but he just laughs.

I offered to call their son but Mr. Oldie said no way!

I offered to go home with them to find their check book so they could write themselves a check to hold them over. No dice.

When I escorted Mrs. Oldie across the street to have her hair done I offered to pay but the hairdresser turned me down. Said he'd wait. This was smart on his part because I don't give 100 percent tips.

Back in the restaurant my son and granddaughter arrived as planned and, when my son heard the story, he offered Mr. Oldie $100 cash to tide him over. (He's never offered me $100 cash! Who carried $100 cash on Saturday morning?) Anyway, Mr. Oldie said "Thanks but no thanks."

So we went on our way - leaving the Oldies to their own devices.

An hour later, as I was walking back to my car I saw (guess who?) my Oldies sitting outside at Starbucks. They'd gone home, found the check book and had come back to the bank to cash a check and solve their money problems only to discover the bank was closed.

So I left them sitting in the sun happily drinking their cappuccinos.

P.S. I'll take them to lunch tomorrow but you know that our wait person is gonna be so disappointed with the tip.


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Let's Be Sensitive

An old friend called me last night because she'd just seen my son on television. I laughed and said,

"Oh, has he been arrested?"

Once when I was younger and leading a large group somebody complimented my super achieving kids and I said, "Well, I'm just thankful none of them are currently in prison."

But I never did that again because it became clear to me in any large group it's probable that somebody's kid IS in prison.

While I was teasing about mine, all of us have feelings of sheer pride and stark terror regarding our children. Sometimes in the same day.

My old friend on the phone told me that, no, my son wasn't in trouble. He was telling us how to deal with our economic issues. Then she told me he was too young to be giving that advice. Then she ended up saying, "I see he has some gray in his hair!"

I guess we all need to be a little more sensitive, including me.

Besides, my kids may or may not be aware that, in our younger days, there were causes that their father and I would have been proud to go to jail for.

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Hot, Flat and Crowded

Thomas Friedman, the three times Pulitzer Prize winner, has written a new book. I know some of you find him a little hard to read. I know this because you've told me. I understand. He uses big words. So I'm here to help. The title says it all:

HOT, FLAT AND CROWDED

Still confused? I'll explain further.

1. HOT. Global warming is real. Our world wide need for energy is real. Saving the planet isn't just a slogan. It's a dire necessity. The good news is that we are fantastic problem solvers. We can fix this.

2. FLAT. While the world wide fast growth of the middle class is gobbling up resources, it's also instantly connected. Little tiny companies and individuals can get their ideas out - instantly. We can fix this.

3. CROWDED. There are way, way too many people in the world - and most of them are suffering mightily because of it. How can we fix this? (OK, don't get me started. You know how I feel about birth control!)

My plan would be for no female in the world to become pregnant - unless she WANTS TO! (This would also take care of another pesky social problem we have in this country.)

Now, what about our current crisis?

Following is a quote from Friedman's book:

Not only is America's leadership the key to the healing of the earth; it is also the best strategy for the renewal of America.



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In Times of Trouble We Need More Stuff

A lot of people are suffering right now. Some of them because their favorite Starbucks has closed.

These days I talk with people most every day who are scared they won't be able to make ends meet. But I also run across people who are totally oblivious to what's happening in the world.

Social scientists tell us that our teenagers are the most brand oriented and materialistic generation in history.

I have a young married friend who told me today that she "hates" going to friends' homes that are nicer than hers. It makes her feel "small."

What's the answer? She needs a better sense of self worth.

Hey sweetie, who you are has nothing to do with what you have.


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I'm 48 Years Old!

Today I took the True Age Test on Facebook. It seems I'm "truly" 48 years old. This is good news and bad news. On the one hand I feel good and am in great health but on the other hand I have these children who are in their 40s.

We can't all be in our 40s!

There's an article in my paper this morning titled "Want to live to 100? Then calm down and start moving."

I think this is excellent advice. It's how I dropped 20 plus years. Of course it took heavy B/P meds to calm me down.


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Taking a Break

Hume Cronyn and Jessica Tandy were one of the greatest couples on the American stage. Married for over 50 years, they were both stars prior to meeting each other.

Their marriage was based on love and respect.

Once, shorty before Jessica's death, Hume was being interviewed on "60 Minutes." At that time the phrase for celebs breaking up was "taking a break." When the interviewer asked Hume why Jessica wasn't there for the interview, he said (with a straight face) "We're taking a break."

The interviewer was momentarily stunned until he realized that Hume was kidding.

My Boyfriend has been here in Florida for six weeks. We've had a glorious time together. He's leaving today. Several friends asked, as always, why? I told them we were "Taking a Break."

They didn't buy it. They knew better.

Playwright Brian Clark once said of Hume and Jessica,

The way they play together is wonderful. The understanding, the bantering. Everything that comes with a lifetime of knowledge.

Even though my Boyfriend and I have known each other for only three years, we each have a lifetime of knowledge. And we know how to play together.

I'll fly to his home in a few weeks. So, after "taking a break," we'll once again be "Starting Over."

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A Dog Named Spot

I don't like labeling. As a wise friend of mine said the other day, a person can label you and then throw you away if they don't like the label.

There's an old story about a dog named Spot. When the owner was asked why his all brown dog was named Spot, he raised the dog's leg to reveal a tiny blond spot.

When I began teaching a class series a while back I asked the group of 18 people to introduce themselves this way:

Tell us your name and something about you that is "conservative" and something about you that is "liberal." After a little coaxing, each person was able to do it.

Please don't call me "Spot."

I'm way more complex than that. We all are.


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Universal Reconciliation

Universal reconciliation is a gigantic concept. It was also one of my husband's favorite themes. He believed in it. So do I. I guess the difference is that I don't see the whole universe holding hands and singing Kum Ba Ya thing happening in my lifetime.

But I agree with my late husband and the Apostle Paul that this is what we should be about. OK, let me rephrase that, this is what I should be about. I know we're all called to different things.

Night before last and all day yesterday many people across the world were celebrating. But not everybody. Many (close to half) of the people in this country were sad and disillusioned. Those of us who are happy need to be sensitive and kind about that.

I feel strongly that I need to look at all sides of issues that are important to me and to try to respect and understand where others are coming from.

I love to read George Will's columns. I don't always agree with him and I don't always understand him - because he's way smarter than I am. Like in this morning's paper he was all about numbers and I didn't really get his point.

But in a recent Newsweek article he talked about 3 "Axioms."

1. All news is economic news. That's because all news conditions the public mood, which shapes behavior, which has economic consequences.

2. All economic news is bad. Because any economic development can be construed ominously: Inflation is down? The economy might be slowing. the economy is growing: Inflation might be coming. Either way, woe.

3. Bad news always contains good news. The price of oil (hence gas at the pump) is down. Want to buy a house? Now's the time.

I do not believe that God brings terrible times upon us. But I do believe that we discover our strengths in bad times. I believe that people working together in this country and around the world can solve many of our economic problems.

And in the process we can be a step closer to universal reconciliation.


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Betrayed by Babar

When I was young I loved the Babar (the elephant) books. He, along with his beautiful, cultured (elephant) wife, Celeste, lived such a sophisticated, structured, orderly life in Celesteville. They had animal teas where they sat in the sun in their fine clothes with their parasols protecting them. I'm sure the books soothed me when my life was in chaos.

Some of my children loved these books as well and I'm quite sure they've shared them with their children.

Now I find that Babar and Celeste were Nazis. Or, at the very least, Fascists.

It seems that Celesteville was the capital of a well-ordered corporate Fascist state. Remember the splendid parade of citizens marching according to their estate or profession - soldiers, musicians, carpenters, fishermen, etc? I guess this is proof.

Remember when Babar's little monkey friend, Zephir, visited his homeland, which is not a kingdom but a military dictatorship under a generalissimo?

No, I don't remember this either but apparently it's further proof.

I've just got to stop reading so many New Yorker articles.


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Halloween Afterthoughts

This morning I read an article about how the new marketing emphasis for Halloween is geared toward teenagers and young adults.

Universal Studios has an attraction called Halloween Horror Nights. Definitely not geared toward children. In fact, there was a big push to get the "Bloody Mary" billboards on the Interstate removed.

Last night at my son's house I didn't see any out of control costumes on the streams of kids who came by. (However, last year I did.) Scary is one thing but an ax in the head with blood dripping down the face is a bit much around preschoolers.

My son let people know that we didn't want to see any teenagers in costumes that would be described as "Naughty." I.E., Naughty Nurse, Naughty Nun, Naughty Princess Leia.

We had a fun G rated Halloween.


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