Panua

Kenya kids who are heads of households

About 15 years ago a woman in my church came home from a trip to Kenya and couldn't stop talking about it.  When I heard her speak I said to the person next to me "We're going to Africa."  I didn't mean me personally.  But I've gotten to go vicariously many times since then.

Our church has a phenomenal ministry in Naivasha, Kenya.  If you want to know more about it look up Panua Partners in Hope.

Cess and Johm

I love that, at this church, you can be part of life changing experiences - no matter your age, your sex, your wealth, your politics or your theology.

We've just had a full week of celebrating Panua.  Yesterday morning Dave and I, and about 250 other people, participated in a Panua 5K Run.  It was so much fun!  Full disclosure - Dave and I didn't run.  We
walked.  I walked fast.  Dave held back a little because he wanted to walk with our friend who had some breathing issues.  Folks were congratulating Dave because he was the oldest participant in the 5K.  But it's no big whoop because we walk three miles every Saturday morning - but not for an amazing cause and not with hundreds of friends.

What a wonderful and  amazing morning.  What a wonderful and amazing world.


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In the Beginning Was the Relationship

All theological language is an approximation, offered tentatively in holy awe. - Richard Rohr

I've just started reading Richard Rohr's book The Divine Dance. He's a favorite of many of my smart friends but I've never read his works.  All I knew was that he's a Franciscan priest and writes really deep stuff.

So I wasn't sure.  Especially since this book's sub title is "The Trinity and Your Transformation."  Oh, oh!  But then I read the quote above and felt better.

I'm loving the book!  It starts out talking about those three angels who visited Abraham and Sarah and how they represent the Trinity - a concept that never entered my mind.  Rohr tells us about a fifteenth century piece of art by Andrei  Rublev  called "The Trinity," which features these angels.  The icon also features three predominate colors:

• Gold represents perfection, God, the ultimate source. 
• Blue - the color of the human, Jesus, and
• Green -  represents the photosynthesis, precisely the work of the Holy Spirit.  

So here are the three angels eating and drinking and enjoying themselves.

"In the beginning was the relationship."


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Why Young Adults Aren't Getting Married

As you well know, I like being married to Dave.  Since Adam and Eve we've used marriage as the model of how human beings should live.  "Man finds a mate."  Done!  Of course, neither Jesus nor the Apostle Paul were married, and John Wesley, the inspiration for the world wide Methodist movement, had a sketchy marriage.

As it turns out the marriage issue is very complicated and ever changing.  We were led to believe that people, particularly women, were hot wired to find a mate and reproduce.  Now we learn that a quarter of young adults (millennials) don't want to get married at all.  For those who do, they're waiting longer than ever.

So, what's up with that?

Michele Sudia, author of Miss Millennia Magazine has come up with 15 reasons why young adults are more and more disenchanted with marriage.   Here are a few of her ideas.

• Marriage is not necessary in a women's life to be successful.  
• Millennials are children of divorce.  Children of divorce tend to have more relationship issues. 
• Most millennials are in debt.  The average cost of a wedding is $26,000.  
• Since time began people have been getting married because a baby was coming.  "They had to get married" was a common assumption when babies arrived a few months after the wedding.  Contraception has changed this paradigm. 
• Sudia tells us:  "...marriage isn't the first step of adulthood...a degree is."  And with the degree comes those crippling student loans.
• Casual sex is readily available via the Internet.
• Careers are stressful.  Weddings cause more stress. 
• The traditional concept of marriage where women are property of their families, and are transferred to their husbands, is no longer appealing.  
• Marriage laws force couples to share debt and make divorce extremely expensive for both partners. 
• Many people don't like living with other people.  They like being alone - and it's become socially acceptable. 

Despite all of the above being true, I think the majority of us enjoy traveling though life with a mate.  I know I do. 

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Hard to Get There

Cartoon from this week's New Yorker

Decades ago, when I lived in Fort Lauderdale, there was a popular restaurant that everybody raved about.  But the thing was, you had to drive a long way on a dirt road then board a little barge that carried 20 people, to an island where this ramshackle restaurant awaited us.  We lined up on the pier and waited, both coming and going.  We all thought it was great and when friends came to town, that's where we took them.

A while back I told you about the restaurant in upstate New York that has an eight year waiting list.  People fly over from Europe, then find transportation for the two and a half hour trip to Damon Baehrel.  (That's the the name of both the restaurant and the chef.)  There are restaurants all over the world that are famous for being hard to find.

And don't get me started on destination weddings.

Seriously, what's wrong with us?


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Tony Campolo

Tony Campolo

The gospel is about grace and we all know that grace is about us receiving from God blessings that we don't deserve.  - Tony Campolo

I was excited last night to get to see Tony Campolo at my church.  I've just finished reading his best seller, "Red Letter Revolution." Tony is a world famous (in some circles) speaker, writer, sociologist and professor emeritus at Eastern University.  He's also highly controversial in evangelical circles.  Here are a couple of personal observations about Tony Campolo.

Tony Campolo or Don Rickles?

First, his communicating style is fantastic.  To me, it's a cross between Don Rickles and Lewis Black.  Why is this important?  He's over 80 years old and he still has over 300 speaking engagements a year.  He's been on the Colbert Report, The Carlie Rose Show, Nightline and Crossfire, to mention a few.  His book is endorsed by Bono.  He's in the mainstream. His message does not appeal to everybody but he's so entertaining folks are attracted to him even if they don't agree with him.

So what's the big deal that makes some fellow evangelicals dislike him?  His theology reminds me of my husband Ken Crossman's theology.  Ken was often called a Bleeding Heart Liberal.  He took it as a compliment.  But he certainly was not "liberal" in his theology.  He believed every word Jesus said.  He was part of the "Red Letter Revolution" well before Tony wrote the book.  Unlike most of today's evangelicals, Tony (and Ken) are primarily about taking care of the poor and marginalized people in the world.

Why?  Because Jesus says so.


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Cracker Cows

Bossy

As I was riding one morning for pleasure
I spied a young cowboy a riding along,
His hat was throw'd back and his spurs was a jingling'
and as he was riding he was singing this song.

Whoopee ti yi yo, get along little dogies,
It's your misfortune ain't none of my own
Whoopee ti yi yo, get along little dogies,
You know that (Florida) will be your new home.  - The Weavers

My son, Scott and his lovely wife, Sherry, who live in a house with running water and a cement pond, and really love gourmet food and fine wines, etc., recently bought an 800 acre ranch.  It's pristine Florida land with a seven mile fence line, with almost nothing man made on it.  And now they have about 50 or so Cracker Cows, all named, happily living there.   And I wouldn't be surprised if the two of them will be happily living there at some point.  But for now they are happily waiting for the old double-wide across the road re-do so they can spend quality weekends with their cows.

Latest Delivery

As you know, I like Florida history and have great respect for the Crackers who hacked their way through this harsh state prior to air conditioning.  But, until recently, I had never heard of Cracker Cows.  In a nutshell, they were brought over by the Spanish Conquistadors in the 16th century.  They are small, bony, beautifully colored, long horned, cows that can survive in our harsh heat.  Also, like the Royals, they are of pure linage.  And they're on the endangered species list.  (Only for the cows it's call the "Critical" list.)  However, Scott and Sherry's cows are happily roaming free and having babies, just like they did in the 16th century.

Scott has always loved the outdoors and, for years, dreamt of being a cowboy.  Sherry's the one who's surprising me.


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Community Fest

Last night Dave and I had our annual ride on the Ferris
Wheel at the Saint Mary Magdalene Catholic Church CommunityFest.  As I've told you before, I used to drive by this neighborhood festival with its carnival atmosphere and wish I could be a part of it, knowing there was no way.

But then I met Dave and he's taken me on Ferris Wheels around the world.  And when I told him about my last ten years of care giving and missing out on this neighborhood fun he said, "Why don't we go every year till we can't go anymore."

And we have.

We wait until dark so we can enjoy the midway lights and then walk the ten blocks or so to the event. Thousands of folks attend over the annual three day period.  Besides riding the Ferris Wheel we watch the band play for a bit, watch the adults and kids on scary rides, visit with neighbors who are there, and eat something crazy.

Last night we watched them make funnel cakes and fried candy bars.  They dipped the Snickers Bars in the funnel cake batter and dropped them into the same boiling grease as the cakes, pulled them out when thy were crispy and doused them with powderer sugar.

We didn't eat anything that crazy.


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Hurricane Matthew is Finally Over

Most of Florida seriously dodged a bullet last week.

The very worst part for us was losing power from last Thursday night to late Sunday afternoon.  It caused discomfort and serious boredom what with living in a hot, dark, silent house.  Not to mention loss of showering.

Our minister told a story on Sunday that helped me immensely.  He flew into town from Chicago last Thursday and thought he'd better fill his truck with gas.  He visited a few stations.  No gas.  Then found a Wawa that was still pumping.  Only the line was around the building and down the street.  He got in line - and waited.  When he got to the pump he had his daughter get out and pump fast so as to not hold up the line behind them.  (He is recovering from foot surgery so is on crutches.)  When she finished he tried to start the car.  No dice.  It was dead.  

Then he went on the preach his sermon on Naomi and Ruth.  This is a story about getting through really hard times.

In the end he went back to his own story.  So he and his daughter are sitting at the pump unable to move the car.  Will those behind him emerge from their cars with pitchforks and torches?  No.  Folks emerged to push the car to another spot.  AAA arrived in 15 minutes, installed a new battery, and they were on their way. 

Wow, That story helped me.  It's tough when things go wrong and you have no idea how or when they'll get right again.

But they almost always do get right again.


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Remembering

Hurricane Matthew is on its way.  This morning when I talked with my son we reminded each other of the three hurricanes of 2004 and how the one coming up tonight might help erase some of those memories.

My husband, Ken, was near death, suffering dementia, pretty much unable to walk and in a hospital bed in our condo.  But he wasn't aware of any of these things.  So when the three Orlando hurricanes of 2004, Charley, Frances and Jeanne came and went, they left me, and our whole family, traumatized.

This time it's different.  Our hatches are battened down.   Our batteries, flashlights and radios are lined up in the kitchen.  Our hurricane door is ready to be lowered.  We've had a pleasant day.  We walked in a near empty mall this morning.  Dave had his usual Thursday afternoon cribbage game with Art at the kitchen table.  We've encouraged friends and neighbors to be ready.  Many prayers have been offered for all those who've been affected and will be affected by Hurricane Matthew.

In 2004:

• Hurricane Charley was a nightmare in my house.
• Three weeks later while Hurricane Frances was whipping up, Ken died in his bed.
• Two weeks after that Hurricane Jeanne arrived at a sad and lonely time. 

Tomorrow will be what it will be.  But tonight I am feeling blessed.


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Playing God

Jerika Bolen

Jerika Bolen was a beautiful - inside and out - 14 year old girl.  She also had type a spinal muscular atrophy, a brutal disease that left her in constant pain.  She never walked and could move only her head and hands.  For her entire life she suffered in ways that we cannot imagine.

Jerika's "Last Dance"

We became aware of Jerika when she announced that she had made the choice to enter hospice and let the disease take its course without further aggressive treatment.  But before that the wonderful folks in Appleton, Wisconsin, where she lived, fulfilled her dream of going to prom.

There has been much controversy about Jerika, a young teen, being able to make this choice.  But, by law, anyone has the right to accept or refuse medical treatment.

Some in the religious community have condemned her (and her mother) for "playing God" with her life.  I, on the other hand, think that our ability to extend life by artificial and cruel means, discounting any quality of our lives and refusing to offer up alternatives like palliative care is, in fact, playing God.

Rest in peace, Jerika



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Arnold Palmer's Values

I wrote about Mr. Palmer's legacy but I also love his values.  Yesterday's sports page was, essentially, a tribute to Arnold Palmer's values.  After reading it I went to church to hear a sermon about values.  So here are a few facts to help us understand how he lived them in his regular day to day life.

• He attended Latrobe High School with Fred Rogers from "Mister Rogers' Neighborhood."  I can't help but think these two helped each other form their quiet, but strong value systems. 
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• He became a pilot to help overcome his fear of flying. I just, in the last 24 hours, had to deal with some fearful news.  I got through it by trying to be my best self rather than my fraidy cat self. 
• He taught hundreds of pro golfers how to comport themselves properly. Yes, we all can think of a few people we wish he could give a lesson on how to comport themselves, especially in the next few weeks. 

• Wait staff at the Latrobe Country Club always had a half-tea/half-lemonade drink waiting for him because he felt it would be ostentatious for him to order an "Arnold Palmer."
• He made eye contact with fans. 
• He broke down in tears at the end of his last U.S. Open in 1994.
• He led the campaign to prevent golf courses from being built in Florida's state parks. 
• His grandkids called him "Dumpy."
• He cried during the national anthem.

I read only one thing that made me kinda of question Mr. Palmer's values. 

• He hung out with Frank Sinatra.

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