2016 Resolutions

It's that time of year.  Everybody likes a new start.  I read an article this morning about keeping your resolutions by making only fun ones - like drinking more (and more expensive) wine.

Last week in Forum, the facilitator for the day asked a provocative question:

If 2016 could be the best year of your life, what would have to happen for this to be true?

This is hard and complicated.  I need to make everybody in my life do what I think is right.  Right?  OK, that won't happen.

Communion Bread

For me, in many ways, 2015 has been the best year of my life.  Seems crazy to say in light of all the bad stuff that came down.  But I know that getting to that place in my head and my heart is an inside job.

And I continue to get do-overs.  I saw on Face Book that two of my favorite people, Myrna and Norlin, helped make our church's communion bread for Sunday.  Whenever I take communion (if I do it right,) I get a fresh start on having the best time of my life.


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We Should All Be Feminists

Dave's young adult granddaughter gave the book We Should All Be Feminists to him, as well as several other male friends and family members, for Christmas last week.  He read it in Chicago in one sitting, then flew to Atlanta where I read it in one sitting.  It's short.

Best selling and award winning novelist, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, wrote the book a couple of years ago after delivering it as a TED talk.  She was raised in Nigeria but now divides her time between the United States and Nigeria.

Chimamanda believes we all should be feminists and promote feminism all over the world. Why, you may wonder, should we do that?  Following are a couple of examples - not from her book - but from the news this past week.

• Today we learned that Japan and South Korea reached an agreement to end the controversy over the Korean women who were used in brothels as comfort women in World War II.  By "comfort women" they mean sex slaves (200,000 of them) who were provided to Japanese troops.  By "brothels" they mean being shipped everywhere to instantly provide sex in, most often, brutal situations.  
• Right here in Central Florida, today, I have friends who are working with young girls who are sex slaves.  Many of them runaways, they are kidnapped, drugged, beaten and brutally raped to condition them to life on the street, controlled by pimps. 
• I read two stories this past week about girls who were sent to study in France, being seduced by ISIS members, impregnated and sent to Syria.    After having their babies it's almost impossible to leave.

What does this have to do with feminism?  Feminism is about respect.  It begins at home.

A couple of weeks ago, when the word came down that American women can now "legally" be engaged in combat in our armed forces, I read several of our newspaper's irate letters to the editor.  One was written by a (I'm sure loving) father and ended by asking if you would let your daughter go into combat,

All I could think about is how, for centuries, parents have been proudly sending their sons off to war. How can we say to our grown daughters, who have the skill, training, determination and the legal right that they cannot.

I love this quote from the book:

Gender matters everywhere in the world.  And I would like today to ask that we should begin to dream about and plan for a different world.  A fairer world.  A world of happier men and happier women who are truer to themselves.  And this is how to start:  we must raise our daughters differently.  We must also raise our sons differently. 


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Hope and Joy

Christmas Joy this Morning

Christmas can be hectic for clergy persons and other professional staff, as well as the rest of us.  Lots of folks in the congregation are extra happy but stressed.  Others are extra sad.  This year, along with all of the above we've had two unexpected deaths in our church staff family in the last few days.  One, a son killed in a traffic accident, another, a husband.

So what was this morning like?  At Sunday school time we had our annual carol sing - with an amazing leader, a harpist, two professional singers and the piano played by the father of the young man who was killed.

Lots of laughing, clapping and good music about the baby coming!  (The baby changed everything!)

Worship was more of the same.  The sermon was on Hope.

Me Being Wise

The other day, somebody asked me how I was able to be a business consultant with my limited skills.  Seriously, that's what he asked me.  It's not really rocket science to love and then carefully listen to people,  and repeat back to them their positive truth.  I did a lot of it.

Still do.


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Young Writers

Connie Schultz, Journalist

By young writers, I mean women with a couple of babies, a job and a complicated life.

Recently a young woman wrote Pulitzer Prize winning writer and journalist, Connie Schultz, asking for help with how to write with so much going on.  Connie posted a photo of herself writing, obviously exhausted, with a baby in her lap.  I instantly remembered writing for many years with a baby (or two) in my lap.

Young Connie Schultz

As for the exhaustion, I think, being successful as a parent, as well as other parts of your life, means being exhausted for about 40 years (if you're lucky.)


I wrote because it was part of my other work but, since I wanted to be at home as much as possible, I wrote with many distractions.  But the primary reason I wrote was because I had to.  I'm a writer.  And you know that my definition of claiming to "be" any kind of artist is that  - "you have to do it."

And my very favorite kind of writing back then (as it is now) was about my own life.  Much of it was about stuff like the joyful frustration of having a baby (joyfully) dump oatmeal on his head.

Tina Fey, American Express ad

Now I'm no longer exhausted.  Or, when I am, I sit on my favorite place on the couch for as long as I want.  I'm at peace and wouldn't change a thing in my life.












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The Curious Incident

In 2003 Mark Haddon's amazing book, The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time, was published.  It was an international best seller.  Later on it was adapted as a play on Broadway and received five Tony awards.

I finally read the book over this past (extremely busy) weekend.  It's written in the voice of a brilliant 15 year old autistic boy.

This is from the book jacket:  Christopher knows all the countries of the world and their capitals and every prime number up to 7,057.  He relates well to animals but has no understanding of human emotions.  He cannot stand to be touched. 

If you know of anyone on the autism spectrum - from aspergers on - you will love, and learn from, this book.  I could personally relate to Christopher because numbers calm me as well.

And the book is very, very funny.

The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time  was this month's pick for my book club.   Yesterday we discussed it.  All but a couple of people loved it and the discussion was rich.  There were 20 women in the room.  Nine of them shared that they had grandchildren or other close relatives with some form of autism.  I found this to be astounding.


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Radical Christianity

Amal Clooney, Muslim

Yesterday in Forum we were introduced to the book, Infidel,  an autobiography by Aynn Hirsi Ali, who was an activist and politician in the Netherlands.  But she was raised by Muslim parents in Somalia, Saudi Arabia and Ethiopia.  Her childhood was a nightmare experience of beatings and harsh treatment in these radical Islamic countries.

Shaq, Msulim

We had no time for questions or discussion so we were left with a very bad view of Islam.  I was a bit disturbed by this what with our current tragedies in San Bernardina and Paris and the outcry of some of our leaders to come down hard on American Muslims.

Dr. Oz, Muslim

So here's something to think about:  American Muslims are a diverse population (like the rest of us) and have been here for over 400 years.  There are around three million Muslims living in the United States.  Including:

Two U.S congressmen

Athletes Shaquille O'Neal, Muhammad Ali and Kareem Abdul-Jabbar

Ellen Burstyn, Muslim

Actress Ellen Burstyn

Journalist and CNN host, Fareed Zakaria

Dr. Oz

Janet Jackson, Muslim

Rapper Ice Cube and music producer Q-Tip

Amal Clooney (wife of George)

Janet Jackson and Jermaine Jackson

Iman (model and wife of David Bowie)

Daily Show correspondent, Aasif Mandvi

The late Casey Kasem

And so on.....

There are varying ideas about how American Muslims should be behaving themselves right now but I'm not as concerned about them as I am about myself.  And my most radical self tells me (from Galatians 5:22) that I should be filled with love, joy, peace, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control.


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Reefer Madness

The marijuana propaganda film Reefer Madness, designed to scare teenagers straight, came out in 1936.  I saw it at the drive-in in the 50s.  Even back then we knew it was a crazy, camp film.

And now my city, Altamonte Springs, Florida, in anticipation of Florida passing a bill legalizing medical marijuana (which it has not yet done) has passed a bill banning 27 terms that the medical pot businesses will not be able to use if, in fact, we do have these places in Altamonte Springs.

Orlando Sentinel columnist, Scott Maxwell, calls this a "goofy ordinance."  And maybe goofy is an additional word our city should have banned because, even thought, of course, I've never tried it, I understand that smoking pot can make you do goofy things.  Like eat an entire bag of Doritos while you're sitting on the couch watching "Family Guy."

So, to recap, if Florida should legalize marijuana and if Altamonte Springs businesses are allowed to sell it, there are 27 words they cannot use.  Among them are:

Marijuana, Cannabis, Bong, Grass, Chronic, Pot, Indo, Reefer, Mary Jane, Demp and Wacky-tabacky.

A few of the words are new to me.  So I've learned something.


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