Wedding Fun

It was fun to be in church this morning and to have so many people congratulate us on our wedding that's coming right up.

By the way, the above photo is not of us. I'm wearing black pants for our wedding. In fact, I'll probably look a little bit like the groom in this photo.

After church we had lunch with my Oldies. If you've ever been around a person who has serious memory issues you know that you have to repeat things.

Sometimes it's fun. For instance, every time we see the Oldies (which is often) we tell them we're getting married. Mrs. Oldie always looks happily surprised and that's nice. Then we tell them the details.

Today when the four of us had lunch at Brio's, we received wedding congratulations from the waiter, the hostess and the manager.

This was all be news to my Oldies.

"You're getting married?"

"Yes."

"Have you set a date?"

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What Is a Joke?

A while back my grandson asked me "What is a joke?"

I said it's usually something that had two different meanings.

He said "Why is that funny?"

I don't know. But it is.

For instance, my really smart friend told us this one last night:

What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor?

Make me one with everything!

Ba-Boom, Boom.


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Stocking Stuffers

For most of my adult life I was exhausted. Getting Christmas together for a big family is always challenging, especially when you're married to a minister and you have umpteen parties to attend and four services on Christmas Eve.

Stocking stuffers were a particular challenge. Our kids got lots of presents but they were mostly small and practical. (Yes, socks and underwear were included.) Stuffing the stockings was redundant.

One version of the origin of this practice is that a bishop put gold coins in the stockings of poor young women so that they'd have a dowry and, hence, be able to marry. Later the coins were replaced with oranges.

This is what I got in my stocking as a child - an orange - but I warn you, don't try this now. It doesn't fly.

An article in the recent "New Yorker" gave some stocking stuffer ideas. Here are a few to help you out. All of the items can be ordered on line.

Squirrel Underpants
Nobody wants socks and underwear anymore but you can order tiny squirrel underpants from a company that will donate a portion of the profits to the Small Animal Decency Fund (to eliminate nudity among animals.)

Chocolate Flavored Toothpaste

Bacon Flavored Floss

Silly Straw
Five pieces of tubing allowing you to have coursing streams of Dr. Pepper swirling around your head.

Small Forensic Science Kit
Gather evidence to construct an air tight case against your little sister.

Baby Flash Light
A baby size anything is cute.


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Why?

When Dave and I told this woman we met at Turtle Bread (where we eat soup) last summer that we were getting married, she had an interesting response.

Why?

I've thought about it ever since.

Why indeed. At our age, stage and with our history, it was a hard decision to make. It's also an extremely complicated one. And, of course, it doesn't help that we're both totally logical (make that anal) about making decisions.

Now, after sessions with ministers, attorneys, financial advisors, our families, friends and mostly each other, I still can't articulate it.

But here's what I know. We're happy. We can't wait. We're as excited as teenagers. More so. We have 401-Ks.

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Best Meal

Dave and I finished up our plans for the family luncheon at the hotel after our wedding. Wasn't a big deal. We just want people to relax and have a good time.

Have you ever played the game where you decided what would be your favorite meal if you could have anything you wanted?

Mine would be several courses starting with a clear soup and a salad with anchovies on top. The entree would absolutely be boiled lobster. My very favorite fancy food. I haven't had one in about four years.

For dessert I'd have a small, intense chocolate something or other. All of this would be accompanied by fine wine - but not much of it.

Dave recently showed me an article about a guy who ordered his last meal before being executed. He had a snack of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in the afternoon. Then at night he had pizza, onion rings, fried mushrooms, Doritos, French onion dip, blueberry ice cream, cherry pie and Dr. Pepper.

To each his own!

By the way, the article said that the next morning the man seemed very calm as he took communion and awaited his fate. I hope the communion helped - and the Doritos too.


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Christmas Shopping

You probably remember me explaining to you in an earlier posting about "Cupcake ism," one of our current ways of indulging in selfish conspicuous consumption.

In the cartoon above, Ted Forth reminds us that we can go whole hog with the Neman Marcus car.

But I hope you don't. I hope you enjoy the season and enjoy buying gifts for friends and family. And especially buying gifts for people you don't even know.

That's the most fun!

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Cappuccino Dave

We recently drove from Minnesota to Florida. It only took us six days. We love our yearly road trip. One of the best parts is seeing people along the way - sharing joys and sorrows.

We shared plenty of each.

When we stopped in Atlanta we had last minute plans to make for our wedding which will take place in that city on December 28th. Most important was driving to the downtown Atlanta courthouse to get our marriage license - a surreal experience. Of course we've both done it before but that was in 1960.

Just sos you know, this is not a romantic experience. You have to stand behind the line until they invite you to the counter. And just answer the questions, no fooling around. When we received our document it came with a lovely pamphlet on HIV.

But, all in all, we had a good time.

We stopped at our favorite Comfort Inn in Tennessee. It sits on a hill and has twinkle lights streaming all the way to the highway. My kinda place.

You may not know this but Dave loves vending machine cappuccino. So we brake for rest stops. As we drove through our nine states to get to Florida he was disappointed with Georgia. No coffee machines at the rest stops. What's up with that, Georgia?

But, as I said, all in all, we had another fun trip.


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