Pride

Dear Abby's column last week ran a letter from a 16 year old girl who attends a private school.  Her problem is that her parents are planning to give her a 2001 car and she can't stand the humiliation of driving this old car to school. 

OK, let's give her a break because she's 16.

My minister finished up an excellent series of sermons this last Sunday.  He dealt with subjects like worry, guilt and loneliness. Sunday he spoke about pride.

Every one of these sermons has spoken to me personally.  Of course, not all pride is bad.  But our need to compare ourselves with others is sometimes crippling.  It's certainly a large part of our big economic meltdown.

Dave and I both feel called to live a simple life - and not use more resources than we need.

I drive a 2000 Toyota Camry.  I like my car but it's older and smaller than anybodys' I know.  When I occasionally need to valet park, none of the guys seem eager and excited to drive my car.

I have an old kitchen.  However, all of the appliances work and, besides that, I don't cook.  But there is pressure to get a new kitchen. When I'm honest with myself, the only motivation to remodel is pride.


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Unknown

I've had a bit of a stressful week, to say the least.  But I don't want to talk about that.  I want to talk about the movie, Unknown.

It is Unknown to me why this movie was number one at the box office this weekend.  We saw it yesterday.  We just wanted a little diversion.  It didn't work. 

As you know, my first priority in movies is to not be bored.  I was bored!  But the reason is not Unknown to me.

It is Unknown why Liam Neeson keeps making these action films.  He's 58 years old (and looks every bit of it in this movie.)  Those of you who read this blog regularly know that in two short years Liam Neeson will be elderly.  I think he is a fine actor and so good as a sad, suffering, introspective character.

Unknown has no humor.  Well, in one scene when he's in the bedroom with the cab driver, who, by the way, is the only interesting person in the movie, Liem and the cabby have a sweet, funny time for about 10 seconds until the shooting starts.

It's a complicated plot with a great reveal.  You'd think that would keep a person on the edge of his/her seat but NO.  By the time it comes, we don't care.  We just want it to be over.

January Jones is her usual beautiful, snarky self.

Unknown is not a total lose., between the car chases, shootings, fights and things blowing up, there are some great scenes of a lovely, snowy Berlin. 


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Turkish Valentine

Dave and I always have a romantic Valentine's dinner on Park Avenue.  But, of course, not on Valentine's night because it's too crowded.  That's "Rookie's Night Out."  All of the romantic folks who never eat out choose that night. 

So we had our romantic dinner on Tuesday instead of Monday.   We wanted to do something different so we went to the Turkish restaurant, Bosphorus.

We sat outside, as always, and, since we were clueless, asked our young Turkish waiter, in this country four years, to order for us.  We'd seen people with great mounds of strange food and bread but we're light eaters so we needed expert help. 

I started out with a glass of Turkish white wine.  Cankaua, Kavallidere.  That's either the name of the wine or where it came from - or both.

Next, we shared an appetizer called Mucver.  It was zucchini patties pan fried with fresh herbs and spices, service over greens, with yogurt sauce on the side. De-lish!

For an entree we shared Grilled Lamb Adana Kebab.  Freshly ground lamb with peppers char-grilled, served with rice, shredded carrots, red cabbage and onions.  Also delish.

Sitting, as we do, on the street we almost always see somebody we know walk by.  Sure enough, an acquaintance stopped by to chat about the middle east.

What a romantic, relevant, international Valentine dinner.

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Sunday School Pants

As you know, I don't wear dresses or skirts so, naturally, I have several pairs of black pants. But I don't have a perfect pair.

I have a pair that were given to me by my good friends' daughter and every time I wear them I think about that family.  And that's good.

I have a pair that is part of a suit given to me by another close friend when she outgrew it.  By the way, that was a very good thing.  She had lost weight and bought the suit when she's was ill but is now healthy and beautiful again.  So I think about her whenever I wear them and that's good.

Some of my black pants are for summer.  Some are lined and I wear them in winter. 

I have two pairs that are shiny black.  One is part of a tuxedo suit that I wear on cruises and the other pair I wore to get married in in 2009.  So they give me good memories.

But not one pair of my black pants is perfect.  They all have small issues.  Most don't fit just right (like those really small ones,) some have pleats, some have wide legs. 

My friend (who is also one of my Power Rangers, as are the other friends I mentioned above) has a perfect pair of black pants.  She calls them her Sunday School Pants.

Like, sometimes she'll say, "Sorry I'm late, I couldn't find my Sunday school pants."

I'm a bit jealous.  I wish I had a perfect pair of black Sunday school pants.


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All You Need is Love

 As you know, I never really caught Beatle Mania.  But just because it wasn't my favorite music in the 60s doesn't mean I don't appreciate the men and their message (and the fact that they changed the face of music.)

Today Dave and I saw Yoko Ono's traveling show, "All You Need Is Love" - The Artwork of John Lennon.

It was on Park Avenue in a great space that used to house a Scandinavian furniture store.  I'm looking right now at a favorite piece of furniture I bought there.

Anyway, we had a pleasant half an hour looking at John's whimsical drawings. 

I was reminded of the peace sit ins, John and Yoko's bed ins, and John's different way of looking at things.

This drawing is called "Dream Power."

The show will be there until tomorrow evening.  It's free! But they're asking for a two dollar donation that will go to the Orlando Union Rescue Mission, one of my favorite places.

Thanks Yoko.

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More In Defense of the Elderly

Yesterday I saw yet another article in the paper that described a person in his 60s as "elderly."  Generally speaking, the term "Elderly" refers to people age 60 to death. 

How ridiculous!

Do we put new born babies and 30 year olds in the same age group?  Do we market to them in the same way?  Of course not.  Then why do we think 60 year olds and 90 year olds can be lumped together?

A while back I saw the following grouping for seniors.  I like it.

Ages 60 - 74    Young Seniors
Ages 75 - 85    Middle Seniors
Ages 86 -         Elderly Seniors

This would be such a smart way for companies to target their merchandise.  In my experience, young seniors spend lots of money on things like sports equipment, technology, learning, travel and entertainment.

But you can't  always go by age.  Some 80 year olds are out every day working at Meals on Wheels, serving "old people."

And some 80 year olds might beat the crap out of you if you called them "elderly."  Take Clint Eastwood or Betty White, for instance.

Another 80 something is the world's wealthiest and hardest working man, Warren Buffet.  I could go on but you get the idea.

Some folks turning 60 this year are Mark Harmon, Suze Orman, Tommy Helfiger, and Arianna Huffington.  They're going to be so sad to learn that they're elderly.


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The Angel Ryan

Yesterday afternoon my computer caught a serious virus.  It began sneezing and spewing out pornographic images.

I hate when that happens!

I quick tried to get hold of my computer guru, Ryan, but by then the whole system had shut down - just before it started throwing up pea soup.  I was more than depressed but went to my meeting anyway.  Thankfully I saw my friend who has Ryan on speed dial.

When Ryan showed up this morning he had on his usual t-shirt and flip flops. 

But he looked like this to me!

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Bloom In Love

I love this latest New Yorker cover.  It reminds us that Valentine's Day day is coming.  It reminds us of Love in Bloom.

But, mostly it suggests that New York mayor, Michael Bloomberg has a big ego. Maybe a little narcissistic.

I don't have any knowledge of that, I think he's been a good, hard working mayor. And this is to be commended since he's the 10th richest person in the country.

But yesterday Dave and I looked at this cover and then talked at length about what it means to have a big ego. 

Not Freud's complicated Id, Ego, and Super Ego - but just the general concept of what a big ego looks like to us simple folks.

I think it's the opposite of self esteem.  I think folks who really feel good about themselves, process it from the inside.  They have a sense of compassion and personal vision.  They have respect for all living things, a sense that we're all divine as well as human. 

I think egotists are basically insecure and need constant feedback from the outside. 

Don't have any idea about where Mayor Bloomberg is in all this - but I love the New Yorker cover because it makes me think.  And I'm hoping this cover made the mayor laugh.


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Loneliness

My minister has been preaching an excellent series of sermons on our emotions. He doesn't call it that but that's what it is. The last three weeks have been on Worry, Guilt and, yesterday, Loneliness.

He referenced a very sad Web site called "A Lonely Life."

He also said this: Loneliness is one of the most miserable feelings a person can have.

Some folks have no patience with lonely people. Some folks think that genuinely Christian people are, by definition, incapable of being lonely.

But let's see....

King David was lonely (Read some of the Psalms.)
The Apostle Paul was lonely
Jesus was lonely (There's no sadder verse in the Bible than "The Son of God has no place to lay is head.")

All of the prophets were lonely. In my opinion, a couple of them were clinically depressed.

I've spent much of my life with the painful feeling of loneliness. I wrote the poem below a long time ago.

SURFACE FRIEND

She appeared at the door,
With her children,
The spend the day
Because she had heard me say
That I was lonely.

"Lady, you don't understand.

I am lonely because
The earth is such a small planet
In the universe.

Because 20,000 people died
In the Guatemalan earthquake,

Because I am a middle aged,
Motherless child.

I thought everybody felt that way,
Sometimes,
Don't you?"


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More on the Ever Changing Internet

Leonard Pitts' column yesterday mentions the video going around showing a 1994 clip of Katie Curic and Bryant Gumbel trying to explain what this new thing "The Internet" was. They couldn't do it because they didn't know.



Pitts says this:


...fundamental changes are occurring at unprecedented speed and you and I have not a clue where we're going, what we're going to be when we get there, or even much time to wonder. We are too busy bailing water from the sinking boats of former lives and professions.


Well, I certainly feel that way some of the time but I think younger people all over the world keep up pretty well. That's why things are happening at such a fast pace that some of our heads are spinning - and some of it is amazingly good.



The remarkable photo above, taken this past Friday and immediately posted on the Internet, shows Christians protecting Muslims as they say their prayers in Cairo's Tahrir Square. .




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Blue Valentine

We saw this highly acclaimed movie a couple of nights ago. Ryan Gosling is an amazing actor, as is Michelle Williams. As you most likely know, they play a couple who's marriage is falling apart.

OK, here are a couple of warnings. This movie is not easy to watch. It's painful and raw and then it's over. The explicit sex scenes are painful and raw and I thought they'd never be over.

The only sweet, funny scene is early on when they're on the street singing and tap dancing. But it's ominous.

You Always Hurt the One You Love.

I've read several reviews. Every one of them says it's an excellent movie about a marriage unraveling. And, of course, it is. One reviewer says they're just like you and me falling out of love.

But it's way more than that. It's about two decent but seriously wounded and scarred human beings. I don't see how either of their lives can move forward until they experience healing.

I say, no, they're not like you and me but I've known a few people like them. They're so individually scarred that they can't function well with anybody, including each other. They need a healthy community's comfort and healing.

But I guess in that sense they are like us.


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